My 2009 NFL Season (And Postseason) Picks

(Photo by Mike Stobe/Getty Images)

AFC EAST

Patriots—(12-4) The machine continues to roll with Wonder Boy back.

Miami—(9-7) They aren't as good as their 11-5 season, but they are somewhere in between. Wildcat will work at times, and at least make them fun to watch.

NY Jets—(8-8) Spend a lot of money, but get little results. They did nicely in FA and Mark Sanchez will get the hell hyped out of him. Personally, I hope he falls flat on his face, but they'll have excues for him if he does.

Buffalo Bills—(6-10) Desperate times (Toronto anyone?) call for desperate action (T.O.). He'll be a good soldier, until they start to lose, which they will. Then the **** will hit the fan, as always.

AFC North

Pittsburgh Steelers—(11-5) Ben and Co. are the closest thing to a Patriots-like machine. This boring vet team has likey taken Colts' place atop the snoozer standings. YAWN.

Baltimore Ravens—(9-7) I expect some regression after last year's boring "NFL's New (and Already Overused) Catchphrase">managing the game" by Flacco. As always, the defense will carry this team, and Flacco will get the credit.

Cleveland Browns—(6-10) It doesn't matter who the QB is, this team has holes at WR, RB, and the defense. The window of opportunity slammed shut (sadly), and it doesn't look to be opening soon.

Cincinatti Bengals—(4-12) They were a team that was already bad (4-11-1) and couldn't score...and they lost TJ Houshmanzedeh. How many shutouts was that after they shut it down last year? Like the Pirates in the NFL, this team deserves its fate, and I'm a Carson Palmer fan, too. They just don't get it, and they never will.

AFC South

Indianapolis Colts—(11-5) Sure, they lost Marvin Harrison, but this lame team always overachieves. Why would this year be any different? Just make the playoffs and bow out as always. The sooner the better, cowtown Colts.

Tennessee Titans—(9-7) Like the Dolphins, I think they overachieved. Still, they are better than most of the teams here, so they'll be okay. It should be interesting to see more of their games, too. Maybe we can learn why they were so good last year...

Houston Texans—(8-8) Aren't they always 8-8 now? Always one player away on offense and defense. And they're still looking for that complement WR to go with Andre Johnson, whose career is being wasted here. Falcons or Dolphins? Try These Teams...">Could they finally break through?

Jacksonville Jaguars—(7-9) They won't be as bad as last year, but they'll still manage to lose 1-2 games that they shouldn't. No Fred Taylor to spell Maurice Jones-Drew will be disastrous for this once-rising team.

AFC West

San Diego Chargers—(9-7) They will make the playoffs like clockwork. LT will get hurt and Sproles will take over. The team will overachieve and win a round, before falling to some real contender like they do every year. Repeat. It must really be frustrating to be a Bolts fan, knowing what's going to happen and not being able to prevent it.

Kansas City Chiefs

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