The most efficient way to sell your product is to get a sexy model wearing a bikini to flaunt it on TV or the Internet—or you can get Hulk Hogan to wear a thong while riding a wrecking ball.
Yes, the Hulkster went full Miley Cyrus, and you never go full Miley Cyrus.
Next Impulse Sports' Paul Sacca happened across this video, and after an assumed WTF expression, he posted it to the website. Well, we now share in whatever befuddled face he initially had, and we also share this Internet gem with you now.
For the few of you who read the article before you click on the video, good job. There is nothing more honorable in life than caution, and we reward you with the stern warning that there is a good amount of rump in this video.
If you are uncomfortable with a professional wrestling legend showing off his older and what seems to be brighter posterior, you can just read our description instead, and actually enjoy your next meal.
It all begins with a gentleman who merely looks like Hogan coloring in a drawing that features our protagonist and the title, "Hostamania." This is the moment that you either question where this ad is taking you or why we ever stopped coloring things for fun.
You aren't given too much time to contemplate, because some random dude hanging upside down starts eating the crayons. We knew a kid like that once, and things didn't go well for him in adulthood.
In any case, this crayon-eating nemesis needs his comeuppance, and he needs it in a timely matter.
Enter Hogan riding a wrecking ball like Miley Cyrus did in that one music video that everyone and their mother has seen by now.
Hulkamania is just as fierce as ever, and it comes in with a stomp to the head and leaves with what seems to be a seductive face.
You are either too weirded out to think or are already searching for the web hosting service that Hogan is advertising here. Either way, we call this commercial a success.
Hit me up on Twitter:
Like the new article format? Send us feedback!