Dear TBS: Please Stick to Dawson's Creek Reruns or Just Shoot Me

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Dear TBS: Please Stick to Dawson's Creek Reruns or Just Shoot Me

Dear TBS,

I enjoy the four-story tall billboard of Josh Beckett that you have in New York's Time Square, advertising your coverage of postseason baseball. It's like a constant daily reminder to them that they are not playing baseball in October for the first time in 14 years.

But with that said, I don't think I can handle your announcers for another five years of postseason baseball coverage.

Your announcers are biased and un-able to commentate a game from a neutral stance.  Chip Caray announces a home run for one team in a dry, monotone, anti-climatic voice, which, if it weren't for my sense of sight, I would have thought was a foul ball. 

However, when the other team delivered a shot to almost the exact same spot, Chip nearly fell out of his chair in excitement yelling, "A HARD HIT BALL DEEP INTO THE DARK OF NIGHT! THAT BALL IS OUTTA HERE!" 

A comment I find especially interesting considering the game was being played inside of a dome, so how exactly is it hit deep into the dark of night?

Perhaps it's the stats you give that also add to my distaste in your coverage. How much longer will it be until you start saying things like, "This guy has yet to reach base during this at-bat."

Or, "These guys are going to have to outscore those guys if they want to win this matchup."

Just because you know how to talk doesn't mean that you have to, nor does it mean you have something interesting to say, because no one wants to listen to you.

You could also increase your field reporter's salary so they don't have to shop for suits at the Goodwill. I'm sick of the god-awful wardrobe that Craig Sager continues to embarrass himself in every night.

A better option might be to get rid of Sager all together. When your field reporter is reporting on chewing gum and admitting that he doesn't understand the game, most people would take that as a sign that he's not the right man for the job.

Find an attractive woman to replace him with, that way I only have to mute the train-wreck of a report, rather than changing the channel completely.

Maybe you could fix the problem with the announcers, and make your coverage of postseason more enjoyable to watch, by simply eliminating your commentators all together. Just mic the crowd, or play some mundane elevator music. Anything is better than your current situation.

Please tell your announcer's booth to either headbutt a speeding locomotive, pick a fight with Chuck Norris, or spare them by giving up your rights to a real sports broadcasting station much like Fox or ESPN. We beg you, for the sake of baseball fans, stop covering the sport we love and stick to showing reruns of Dawson's Creek.

Sincerely,

Baseball Fans Across America

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