Chris Bosh Leaves Toronto, Signs With Olympiakos of Greece [SATIRE]
Bosh confirmed rumors that he would not be playing in Toronto next season, shocking his Twitter followers and fans, by signing a deal with Olympiakos of the Greece 1-A League.
"I wanted to move on in my career. Take a step that most people don't take. Olympiakos is that step," said Bosh in a statement released to the press.
Olympiakos is currently is the championship for the 1-A League, battling the Panathinaiko Reds for the title. The Greens are ranked second-best in all of Europe.
Coming into the off-season, Bosh was one of many highly-touted free agents, a list that includes the likes of LeBron James, Dirk Nowitzki, Dwyane Wade, Joe Johnson, and Ray Allen. Bosh's signing eliminates one of the top money makers from that list.
His contract is reportedly worth four years, $10 million.
Why accept such a small contract when he could have made over quadruple that in America? Why not let Bosh answer that.
"I'm a trail blazer. And not on Portland. I couldn't do that team. Europe ain't never seen nothin' like this before."
After losing the eighth and final playoff spot in the East to Chicago in the final week of the regular season, Bosh immediately began searching for options. He asked his Twitter followers whether he should stay or go, then narrowed his desired destinations down to five. None of those was Olympiakos or any other Euro team.
This signing may open up doors for other players in the NBA.
"Everybody wants to play in Europe, right?" Bosh posted on his Twitter page.
In his statement, he wrote "it's difficult to leave such a great basketball city in Toronto (lol), but I am moving on." Many Raptors' fans will have an outcry over this statement.
He will join former NBA star Josh Childress over on Olympiakos. Childress left the Atlanta Hawks, taking his afro with him to Greece. Bosh will take his thin dreadlocks with him.
"I'm also going to teach Greek hoops fans a bit about American hairstyles. They're going to have to watch either Hairspray or Grease."
Rumors are circulating that ESPN will cover Bosh's first game in his European career. While nothing is certain, he is expected to begin his contract next week in Game Four of the championship series.
"This run in Greece will be great. Sorry, America, but I just can't play pro ball every day with you guys. I'll have fun with Olympiakos. I'm as sure as purple platypus."
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