The 12 Days of Christmas: Sports Edition

'Tis the season for friends, family, fun and Christmas carols. The same tired old songs we're forced to listen to every December for the entire duration of our lives. Seriously, these things are blasting at the mall, the grocery store and even the freaking gym. 

How come nobody writes new Christmas carols? Some people are adverse to change, but there's nothing wrong with changing things up every now and again. That is why I've re-imagined "The 12 Days of Christmas," one of the worst carols, by replacing all of those birds with some of the biggest sports stories of 2011. 

Can you say instant classic? 

On the First Day of Sports-Mas...

On the first day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: The first Heisman winner in Baylor's history. 

In 2011, Baylor quarterback Robert Griffin III came out nowhere to win college football's top honor. When Stanford quarterback Andrew luck decided to return to school for one more season, most people thought that the 2010 Heisman Trophy runner-up was a lock to take the trophy in 2011. 

Apparently, RGIII didn't get the memo about the inevitability of "The Next John Elway." And on behalf of everyone who is sick to death of listening to "Suck for Luck" speculation, let me just say "thank you!" 

On the Second Day of Sports-Mas...

On the third day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Two of the Big Three.

In July 2010, ESPN aired a one hour program called "The Decision," dedicated to LeBron James' announcement that he would be taking his talents to South Beach. As if an unprecedented cable announcement wasn't going to create enough pressure for the emotional fragile forward, then he went and guaranteed the Heat would win eight championships or more. 

To clarify: Nobody is "hating" on LeBron. Dude was completely within his his rights to go wherever the crap he wanted to after serving his time in Cleveland. But when you leave your home state in favor of Miami and guarantee eight championships, you better dang well deliver in the playoffs. 

Well we all know that LeBron didn't deliver in the playoffs, particularly in the fourth quarter against the Mavericks when it mattered most. No. 6 was more than willing to take cheap shots at a flu-ridden Dirk Nowitzki when the Heat were still up in the series, but his postgame presser following Game 6 was vintage LeBron. Essentially saying: "Yeah, maybe my team lost in the NBA finals to a less talented team, but tomorrow I'm going to wake up a millionaire and you're going to wake up a loser."

In a December 2011 interview with ESPN's Rachel Nichols, LeBron showed a genuine remorse for his actions and how things went down regarding his departure from Cleveland. Personally, I thought his responses were genuine and that he legitimately regrets some of the spectacle and the hurt...I guess we'll see in 2012.   

On the Third Day of Sports-Mas...

On the third day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Three fired coaches.

In 2011, three NFL head coaches were fired midseason. The Dolphins management tried to lure Jim Harbaugh to Miami in January, making it quite clear that head coach Tony Sparano wasn't in their future plans. Sparano started the season on the hot seat and the Dolphins 0-8 start sealed his fate. Nobody was surprised to see him go. 

The in-season dismissals of the Jaguars' Jack Del Rio and the Chiefs' Todd Haley were slightly less expected. When the decision was made to cut starting quarterback David Garrard days before the start of the regular season, Del Rio's days in Jacksonville were numbered. But usually, nine years of service is enough to keep a coach employed through early January. 

Todd Haley led the Chiefs to the playoffs in just his second year, but in his third year, a series of devastating injuries resulted in a 5-8 record in December. Perhaps he would have been given another year had it not been for well publicized tension with general manager Scott Pioli. 

On the Fourth Day of Sports-Mas...

On the fourth day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Four points for Sid.

After suffering two major blows in January 2011, Penguins superstar center Sidney Crosby was knocked out for almost an entire calendar year with lingering concussion symptoms. Many questioned whether Sid would every play again, but he returned to the Pens' lineup in November 2011. 

Sid proved that he's the greatest player in the game by racking up four points in his first game back against the Islanders. Unfortunately, his return was short-lived. On December 12th, it was announced that he was out again indefinitely with concussion-like symptoms. 

On the Fifth Day of Sports-Mas...

On the fifth day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Five months locked out.  

A few months into the NBA lockout, a season by 2012 started to seem hopeless, particularly when the NBAPA rejected what the owners described as their "best offer" right before Thanksgiving. 

Well, apparently, it wasn't their best offer, because a deal was reached just days later. 

On the Sixth Day of Sports-Mas...

On the sixth day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Tebow winning six straight!

In 2011, the entire country came down with a fever, and the only prescription was more Tim Tebow! Perhaps things will calm down in 2012, but this year couldn't be described as anything less than legit Tebow Mania. 

Everyone has an opinion on Tebow, but no matter what that opinion may be, nobody expected No. 15 to go 7-1 in his first eight starts for the Broncos, including winning six straight as underdogs in every game.

Maybe the Broncos will win their division and freak John Elway out by do something in the playoffs, but even if they don't, Tebow's first season in the NFL is officially unforgettable. 

Whether you like it or not!

On the Seventh Day of Sports-Mas...

On the seventh day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: A Cardinals Game 7 victory. 

In October 2011, in the ninth inning of Game 6 of the World Series, the Texas Rangers were within one out of their first championship in franchise history. Well, ultimately, they lost the game and went on to lose the series to St. Louis. 

On the Eighth Day of Sports-Mas...

On the eighth day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Butler's No. 8 seed. 

In the 2011 NCAA Tournament in April 2011, the No. 8 seeded Butler Bulldogs knocked off the No. 1 seeded Pittsburgh Panthers in the second round of the NCAA tournament. 

The Bulldogs were a No. 8 seed going into the tournament, but they knocked off Old Dominion, PITT, Wisconsin, Florida and VCU in successive years. They've been legitimate contenders in the last two years and have lost to Duke and Connective in successive years.

On the Ninth Day of Sports-Mas...

On the ninth day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Boston blows a big lead. 

In late August 2011, the Boston Red Sox had a nine-game lead and were considered a lock to claim the AL Wild Card. By late September, the lead had dwindled down to nothing, but the Sox were still in decent shape; all they needed was a win over the lowly Orioles or a Rays loss to the Yankees to clinch their playoff spot. 

Unfortunately, that worked out about as well as you'd expect, given what they had done in September to that point. The Sox blew the game against the Orioles, and the Rays came back from a seven-run deficit to beat the Yanks. 

On the 10th Day of Sports-Mas...

On the 10th day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: 10 Gamecocks Triumphs. 

Before hiring former Notre Dame coach Lou Holtz in 1999, the University of South Carolina had been the caboose of the SEC East for almost a decade. Year after year, the Gamecocks improved their record and their team, but after winning the SEC East in 2010, they were projected to be the class of the SEC East in 2011.  

The Gamecocks didn't win the SEC East in 2011, but they did beat the division-winning Georgia Bulldogs despite a well publicized quarterback controversy. They also finished with 10 wins, though, which was the second-most in the history of the program's history, and won six SEC East games for the first time since joining the conference in 1992. 

Losing starting quarterback Stephen Garcia may have been a blessing in disguise, since backup Connor Shaw proved to be the better athlete in the absence of Garcia. 

On the 11th Day of Sports-Mas...

On the 11th day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: A Rory McIlroy victory. 

In June 2011, Irishman Rory McIlroy became "The Next Tiger Woods" when he won the U.S. Open with a record 11-under-par. The victory came just under three months after his epic collapse at the 2011 Masters tournament, where he shed a seven-stroke lead in just over 12 holes. 

In March 2011, months before his victory, McIlroy said that Tiger Woods was once intimidating but was now just an "ordinary golfer." Then, in December 2011, the No. 1 ranked golfer in the world, Luke Donald, declared that McIlroy has more natural talent than Tiger woods. 

McIlroy finished 2011 with a victory at the Hong Kong Open and some practice at sky-high Dubai. Tiger finished 2011 with his first tournament win in two years at the Chevron World Challenge in Los Angeles.

It might be too soon to say that Tiger is officially back, but here's hoping his New Years resolution is to put an overconfident Irishman back in his place. 

On the 12th Day of Sports-Mas...

On the 12th day of Sports-Mas, let me give to thee: Rodgers wins his first ring.

In 2011, No. 12 led the Green Bay Packers to their first Super Bowl of the post-Brett Favre era.