Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
Philadelphia at Detroit (+3)
Head trauma is all the rage in Philly, with Kevin Kolb and Stewart Bradley suffering concussions last week against the Packers.
But heads are spinning in Detroit as well after Calvin Johnson's apparent touchdown catch was nullified by the correct (but wrong) interpretation of a rule that clearly needs, ironically, further review.
"If you look closely at the replay," said Jim Schwartz, "you'll see Calvin catch the ball with two hands, with two feet inbounds before falling, where two knees, his rear end, and elbow, and one hand land inbounds. What more does he need? If there would have been any other body part involved, he would have been charged with indecent exposure."
I certainly feel for Calvin. Much like Javon Walker a few years ago, he was robbed. But I suspect "Megatron" will take it in stride. He's been screwed before, like on Draft Day 2007.
Since Kolb is not cleared to play on Sunday, Michael Vick, who subbed admirably against the Packers, will start. Vick passed for 175 yards and rushed for 103, flashing the skills that made him one of the National Football League's most feared players.
"Don't forget," said Andy Reid, "Mike was equally feared by the American Kennel Club. But that Michael Vick has long been dead and buried. Digable Planets once sang of the 'Rebirth of Slick.' Well, this may very well be the 'Rebirth of Vick.' And you know what? I'm cool with dat."
Vick is unstoppable, throwing for two touchdowns, rushing for another, and generally baffling the Lions defense. Johnson has nine receptions and one touchdown, and also catches several NFL rulebooks thrown at him by angry fans.
Philadelphia wins, 31-24.