20 Great Sports Questions...From A Girl

My boyfriend loves sports.

Sure, I enjoy me a good game, match, or tournament now and again…note the “now and again”.  So, admittedly, often when watching the Elite Eight, the Fiesta Bowl, the Giants 67^th season game, or Barcelona versus Man-U, my mind begins to wander. 

Myriad questions about the operations of sports, the seemingly unfounded ‘givens’ start to come to my mind.  Of course, my instinct is to blurt them out in blissful wonder, but I usually bite my tongue in favor of respectfully preserving the guys’ attention to that unexpected third period goal.  Nothing kills a round of high-5s like an indifferent chick pondering out loud how often they have to repaint the lines under the ice.

So, avid sports fanatics, in this forum you may opt to close the page and tune me out.  But, if your mind has ever happened upon some random musing about a sport, read on and see if it happened to wander upon the same random musing as mine did. 

1. If one wins the Masters, is he expected to actually wear the green jacket out and around to banquets and such?  What about just dinner out?  That’s a pretty intense green; what color pants would you wear with that jacket?

2. When I’m in a room with a group of guys intently watching the game, what percent of them actually really, truly understand what’s going on?

3. Why does the away team wear white in some sports and the home team wears white in others?  Just when I thought I had that down, bam – a new sport season starts and I’m confused again.

4. And speaking of uniforms, does some poor sap do the laundry between each game for the whole team?  Do players at crappier programs have to bring them home and wash them themselves? 

5. Why don’t they just project a yellow line across the football field to help the people in the stands out?  They have to have the laser technology to do that now.

6. Where does one draw the line between dramatizing the foul for a favorable call and just being a pussy?

7. Why is it okay for baseball players to be kinda fat?  Don’t they run bases during practice like we did in JV?

8. At what point did they decide those short basketball shorts weren’t okay anymore?  I get the style issues, but aren’t they more aerodynamic or something?

9. Why do they rotate people in at hockey games every couple of minutes but make soccer players play most of the match?

10. What is it about baseball that says chew something?  Why don’t other sports players chew things on the bench (don’t get me wrong, I’m completely glad they don’t)?

11. What does a player do if he suddenly has to pee during the game?  Are you allowed to step out?

12. How do they decide which teams play in bowl games?  I mean, how is it reasonable that ND has a bowl game more or less every year?  Awfully rigged if you ask me…

13. Who has it worse, a hockey goalie or a catcher?  And why would anyone opt to be either…what a crappy gig.

14. When there’s a total Cinderella-story team, do some folks from the opposing club kinda want them to win a little?  Otherwise, doesn’t that make them akin to the Hawks in Mighty Ducks?  No one wants to be the evil team all in black. 

15. Can professional players take a personal day?  What if there’s a wedding, or a funeral, or another important personal event that the women in their life will be super pissed if they don’t attend?

16. Why are there no bands in the pros?  Seems a little unfair that cheerleaders can go pro but band players can’t.  My roommate in college was in the band and she practiced hardcore.  Plus, who doesn’t like the band?  I feel like maybe they should pilot the pro band concept in at least one major league sport.

17. Is anyone doing constant background checks on the refs / umps to make sure they’re not rigging games?

18. If you’re not supposed to grab a facemask, why did they redesign the helmets so the facemasks protrude more?  If you ask me, that's just mean.