Tiger Woods Press Conference: A Bogey of an Apology

To properly set up his press conference on Friday for those in attendance and the millions watching at home, Tiger Woods should have shown a clip from the movie "Shampoo," so everyone would know exactly why they were there.

Tiger Woods could have then dimmed the lights and turned on the projector as the 1975 classic came on the screen.

Warren Beatty played a libidinous hairdresser with a very healthy sexual appetite, and a smorgasbord of women to satiate that hunger.

He could have went to the scene where Beatty got caught by his live-in girlfriend in the movie, Goldie Hawn, having his way with Julie Christie on the floor of a coach house on an estate that you could imagine Tiger owning.

Elin, I mean Goldie, asked Beatty for an explanation. She told him she wanted to know the truth. She didn’t want any excuses, admitted she had been a fool for trusting him, and just wanted to know how many women he had been with.

Tiger, I mean Beatty, hemmed and hawed as he contemplated what to say. Looking around the room for answers, counting out in his head and using his fingers, he finally stammered, “Let’s face it, I fu__ed them all.”

“I can’t help it. I see a beautiful woman and I’ve got to have her.” 

Or even an average, and I’m being nice, waitress from Perkins Pancake House.

That wasn’t exactly what Tiger said, but he did say he felt ‘entitled’ because he worked so hard and thought he had it coming to him.

“I thought I could get away with whatever I wanted to,” Woods said.  “I thought that I worked hard my entire life and deserve to enjoy all the temptations around me.”

Just like with former President Bill Clinton, Tiger Woods’ sexual escapades were a personal thing between him and his wife.

Unfortunately, when you‘re a public figure, whether the president or the most famous athlete in the world today, nothing is private.

Tiger came out of hiding to address his indiscretions in his first step to try to clean up his image, and eventually get back to what he does best—playing golf.

That’s exactly what he should have done today.

There was no need to mention his foundation. We didn't care about what his religion has to say.

He shouldn't have addressed the steroid allegations.

And we certainly did not need the angry Tiger Woods admonishing the media for harassing his family.

This was not the place for that.

Of course he was right. His family is not to blame for what he did, and they should not be the ones punished for his sins.

But being part of the public eye helped him garner his fame and fortune; and this is the price you pay for celebrity.

Finally getting a chance to watch the video late Friday night, he seemed contrite; though I would have preferred him speaking from the heart rather than an outlined speech probably not of his own doing.

You look more sincere when you’re not reading from a script.

He did apologize to Elin for his actions and said he had a lot to atone for.

He still has a lot of work in front of him, whether it’s addressing his sexual addiction and the treatment that goes with it, or trying to save his marriage and keep his family together.

It’s going to be difficult to get back the dream life that was his just a few short months ago.

But if he’s going to get there, he’s going to have to lose his anger at others like the media, and direct it where it belongs—with him.