Sheamus O'Shaunessy Holding WWE Title Was Practical Joke (Satire)

Recently, audio tape was uncovered that detailed the conversation between John Laurinaitis and Vince McMahon giving the WWE title to Sheamus O'Shaunessy. 

Here is a transcript of what was said:

John Laurinaitis - "So Vince, Cena is champion and we said we would not have Cena vs Orton anymore, where are we going with the WWE title from here?"

Vince McMahon - "These f*&$ing Internet writers keep saying we can't have Cena vs Orton anymore so I guess we have to come up with something new."

JL - "What if we gave the title to Big Show?"

VM - "Nah, he is already in a team with Jericho."

JL - "What about an HBK run with the belt?"

VM - "Maybe, but he is running around with Hunter doing the DX thing."

JL - "How about bringing JBL back in, he has a good feud with Cena that is a few years old?"

VM - "I heard he is associated with MMA now, and I want nothing to do with that."

JL - "Well we don't have many other people who could hold the belt."

VM - "You know what, just to screw with these Internet critics we should give the belt to someone new who doesn't deserve it at all."

JL - "That would be pretty funny."

VM - "No, I'm serious. Let's give the belt to someone who has been here less than six months and has no fan following what so ever."

JL - "That would be a pretty big middle finger to the fans, Vince."

VM - "F#$% the fans John, we don't have fans, we have a universe."

JL - "Who did you have in mind?"

VM - "Well lets see, we could give the belt to Evan Bourne."

JL - "No, he is too busy losing every match we put him in."

VM - "I know, Tyler Reks, people hate that guy"

JL - "Who?  Oh yeah, didn't we fire him already?"

VM - "I don't know, hmmm, let's see, who has been here only a couple of months who we could use to give a big FU to the fans?"

JL - "I know, Sheamus, he is new and has no fans yet."

VM - "Well he is Irish, and I am, too, so that helps."

JL - "Plus, he is friends with your son in law, HHH."

VM - "Well that settles it right there, Sheamus will hold the WWE title and all the Internet critics who say we use Orton and Cena too much will be begging for that feud to come back."

JL - "But how do we get the belt back to Cena right away?"

VM - "You know what, I say we let him hold it for a while just to upset the Internet Wrestling Community, maybe til the Rumble, or even Wrestlemania."

JL - "Wouldn't that hurt our ratings with the 18-49 key demographic?  Having a guy no one has heard of beat our top guy?"

VM - "Who give a rats ass, we are only targeting children these days, so the adults can go screw themselves."

JL - "What about all the guys in back who have been here for years and never held a title?"

VM - "Guess they should have hung out with Hunter more often, then we would care about them."

JL - "Good point.  I will go tell Cena that he will be losing to a rookie from ECW who has never had a PPV match."

VM - "Good, and go tell Orton to be nicer to kids will ya, he keeps pissing off their mothers."

JL - "Will do Vince."

Now we all know that Sheamus holding the WWE title is just a joke, Vince's way of saying eff-you to us who write about wrestling.

This article is classified as humor and is in no way intended to be taken seriously.  Although I do think that this is probably similar to how it all went down.