Since we initiated our weekly Open Mic about the beautiful game of world football (aka "soccer") and its future in the United States, I've read a handful of pieces suggesting that the sport will simply never catch on in this country.
I'm here to tell you, my fellow Americans, that you are wrong, wrong, and wrong again.
Trust me here—for I was once like you.
I hated the lack of scoring, and the never ending sense that nobody ever had true possession of the ball. I couldn't stand the way the players fell down on purpose and laid all over the field for minutes at a time like a bunch of babies.
The shin guards, the acting, the silly cards the refs stuck in the air (can't you just announce the penalty and enforce it like a man?) It reeked of a softness that made Dirk Nowitzki look like Mike Tyson on PCP.
And perhaps most importantly, this whole notion that you couldn't use your hands...
I mean, come on now: in America we use our hands for everything!
We use our hands to clutch our french fries and burgers as we inhale another extra value meal—before licking our fingers to consume every last grain of salt.
We use our hands to crack open our beer cans—and then again to flip them upside down and consume the liquid found within the metal container at warp speed. We use our paws once again to crush the container aggressively and remind us we're sane—and finally to throw the remains on the ground in a frenzy of testosterone.
We use our hands to grab our wallets when we pay for things, which we love to do; we use our hands to embrace our women and hold them close, letting them know that if any jerk looks at them the wrong way that they'll end up with a bloody lip.
It's no coincidence that soccer is not seen as a very "American" sport. The fact that it's so popular in the rest of the world but not here just feeds into this stereotype.
- B/R Ticket Guide
And then, when we see our teams go down to the likes of Italy, France, or Brazil, it gives us reason to further shun the game as illegitimate.
After all: us Americans don't like to be second best.
But the truth, everybody—no matter how much you don't want to hear it—is that it's all in your head.
Soccer isn't unAmerican in the slightest. We Americans adore sports as much as any other nation.
And as a sport with as rich of a historical tradition as any—constantly overflowing with athletic entertainment—its due time that we begin to appreciate the great game of soccer (err..."football").
This is a nation that feeds on competitive athletics; the nation of Babe Ruth and Jackie Robinson.
The nation of Jesse Owens and Jerry Rice.
The nation of Michael Jordan, Muhammad Ali, and Tiger Woods.
If we can enjoy the talents of these great performers, we can surely acknowledge the likes of Pele and Beckenbauer—or more recently, that kid Ronaldo out of Portugal.
Soccer is by no means a slow paced game that we as a country are too restless to embrace. There is continuous action for 90 minutes; the idea of a "timeout," "commercial break," or "two minute warning" simply does not exist.
We're too impatient for soccer, ehh? Give me a break! Have you ever watched a baseball game?
I traveled to Germany with some friends for the last World Cup and it totally changed my perspective on the game. Being forced to watch entire matches at a time made me realize how talented those guys on the field were, and how a great play could so easily energize a crowd.
At the end of the trip, I felt like a complete bufoon. I had missed out on so many great games simply due to narrow mindedness.
As a child, when my father made me watch Diego Maradona play I hardly gave a rat's ass. I could have been studying the game and learning about its intricacies the way I had with baseball, football, and hoops.
Instead, I hid my face in the cowardly notion that soccer wasn't for me because "there wasn't enough scoring." It was foolish.
Look, I know we like to do things our own way over here. I know we've got four great professional games that we're already attached too at the hip.
But look guys: there is a reason why soccer is the world's most popular sport. It is a game that requires a steady combination of speed, athleticism, endurance, and power.
And before you jump down my throat for that last one, why don't you do yourself a favor and watch Roberto Carlos kick this goal.
Mark my words, young Americans: in your lifetime, the United States will reach a World Cup Final. And when that happens, this entire country is going to open their eyes to the beautiful game.
You meanwhile will sit there, like I did, wondering why you didn't start caring sooner.
It's not too late—you can still jump on the bandwagon fresh and early before everyone hops aboard.
The European Championships is in full effect right now, and it just continues to get more exciting. TIVO some games while you're at work, and instead of watching the Red Sox or Yankees when you get home, tune in to some world class football.
It might take some getting used too, but I promise it will be worth it in the end.
Take it from me, former ugly American: soccer is here to stay.
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5 months ago
haha good article; soccer can definitely surpass hockey, baseball, fighting, etc., but never the NFL or Nascar, and probably not the NBA...............
all you soccer promoters out there have forgotten America's love of organized violence and violence in general. We tend not to care for grass fairies laying on the field, or having to be carried off via strecher for the most mundane of injuries. Besides, Basketball is our version of soccer, it has continous movement, a blend of speed, finesse, stamina, more scoring, and a referree that can subjectively alter the game and unjustly award free points to a team.
As for me I don't mind soccer, its generally more interesting than baseball, and about the same as basketball. As long as it dosen't get in the way of the NFL (which it won't) I could care less; itll be another reason for a loud, drunken, obnoxious american to zealously boast about why his country is number one and better than everyone else. haha
5 months ago
I like to think I've got a unique point of view on this issue, considering I'm a soccer player, or at least a former one, or at least in between years of my unprofessional career.
Anyway, I used to be totally against watching it. I simply couldn't sit there and gaze at a television while the game was happening.
Today, to a certain point, I'm still like that. My excuse is, I'm a guy who played the game, and I'd much rather be playing it than watching it. That's just how I operate.
But I have an extreme appreciation for the sport. If the game is high magnitude, I can watch it. Let's face it, if it's not golf, I'm going to watch it. I'm simply a junkie.
America's perception on the sport is just that. I'm not really sure many have sat down and watched a high pressure game or went through one understanding what was at stake.
Maybe your right, maybe it will take that day that the United States reaches a Cup final for the country to open up their eyes and see what a great game it is and to appreciate it.
As for our cards and feigning of injuries. It's an instinct. I've never been one to flop, but once I started indoor, it's almost impossible not to use getting slammed into a wall as a "tactic." But, yes we are a sneaky bunch.
Great work Zander, I enjoyed that.
5 months ago
America has to forget Europe and look south.
America has the greatest football on the planet right next door.
Participate in tourneys and grow is the secret.
Paraguay beat Brazil....Ecuador almost beat Argentina in Argentina (something no Euro team can do)
When you play with the greats you grow.
5 months ago
I wonder if europeans are asking themselves "When will we embrace american football?"
Lol.
from 5 months ago
Nop; for the very same reason we don't ask ourselves when we'll embrace european football. But soccer has a bigger chance of becoming popular here than american football does in europe.
That being said though it will never reach the same level as the NFL in this country; and in my opinion rightfully so haha. I'll have no problem with soccer being #2.
from 5 months ago
Personally I hope soccer NEVER becomes popular in America. It would just mean more competition for by beloved club and national team, and there is way too much competition already.
Its also probably better for america that you never know all the diguisting shit that happens in soccer. So many soccer fans are crazy assholes who'll slice you up if you wear the opposite sides jersey and players are hedonistic heroin-injecting whore-orgy-having jerks wasting money at their WAGS and seaside villas instead of being decent human beings. Our scandals are so much worse...soccer can really bring the ugly side of humanity, it makes american sports look wholesome and clean. I'd be afraid to take my family to Celtic-Rangers game, so much hatred.
from 5 months ago
Well I think soccer players provide better examples than baseball or football players. Everytime you turn around someone shot somebody else or is taking steroids.
But it was a nice article Zander, having grown up in a family with my dad playing soccer growing up and my brother before me, it was just the thing to do. I tried many other sports (baseball, basketball, track, hell, even lacrosse) before deciding that soccer was what I wanted to do. I feel that we'd like soccer much more now if the Germans hadn't cheated us out of a semifinal berth in 2002 . . .
from 5 months ago
Franco, trust me soccer players and fans are the worst examples towards little kids in all of sports. Only in our sports do players get shot by the fans, and only in our sport do players ON THE SAME TEAM arrange a mafia hitman to take out their teammate, and only in our sport do players throw a live grenade into a bus of opposition supporters.
As far as the steroid thing goes, FIFA is really really strict on that, much more so than the NFL or MLB. There have been 195 cases of heroin being caught last year by the drug tests. I'd rather have my kid injecting steroids than heroin.
from 5 months ago
I'd say NFL players are worse off the field than soccer; in fact i don't think its even close. But in regards to fans being lunatics and doing horrendous shit off the field soccer wins out.
5 months ago
Just one question - why is American Football called as such? I have mostly seen players run with the ball in their hands for a "touch down".. anyways, it's something that I've never understood.
Football will catch on to the USA without a doubt, but I think it will take ages - probably until the USA national team do something significant to catch the audiences' attention.. that's the only way the country can get involved as a whole.
from 5 months ago
Because it was born from association football and rugby football, the same school of british sports from which american football originates. Back in the 1800 England's Football Association (The FA) made "Cambridge Rules" to get all the various football games played in universities in a unified code of rules, but had trouble. A lot of the football rules back then very very different from today...back then football had a lot more shin-kicking, broken legs bones and you could catch the ball with your hands before using your feet to kick the ball forwards, something still used in aussie rules football.
Rugby came from Association Football because a guy called Will Ellis was a sucky footballer so one day instead of using his feet to advance the ball, he didn't throw it down but carried it and put it in a net. At first they all thought he was a idiot and that's how we got rugby, carrying a ball in your hands is easier than dribbling it with feet so a new school of football is born called rugby football that mixed kicking and carrying. From then on various colonies of the British Empire like the united states, australia, ireland all took up either association football or rugby football and made a national sport out of them. Australia made aussie rules football from a mixture of early rugby and football codes, Ireland made Gaelic football from the two codes and Americans mixed rugby and chess to produce American Football. But they all come from the same code of original football and therefore became known as in short as "football" in each respective nation, with each nation having a different version to make a distinct national culture apart from the British. That's why there has been so much resistance to "soccer" in america and australia, and to a much lesser degree ireland.
from 5 months ago
The only thing i could think of is that they run with it, so they are on foot. Football... Or, it is all about yardage i suppose. How many feet in a yard? May be yardball or feetball would be more descriptive. I know, it's tenuous.
5 months ago
Hey Zander, I am kind of like you. I wasn't a soccer fan at all because I thought the players were soft. That changed when I started to watch my friend's games. Right now I just love the game because of EURO 2008. If the MLS could have games like the Portugal-Germany game, I would watch all the time. I love aggressive teams like the Dutch.
Go Orange Crush!
5 months ago
gem you are being a little bit dramatic i think. broad sweeping generalisations like yours are never correct, I think you forget about the other few billion fans who don't do these things and the millions of players who don't behave like that. as for the heroin thing maybe they are just taking the odd E and the heroin comes up in the test. I don't think a professional athlete could be called a 'junkie' or anything though. So what if they have orgies with prostitutes? a lot of people would if they had the money to buy clean call girls. What are you some sort of Puritan throwback?
Most of the trouble making fans just need the excuse and unfortunately football provides them with it because of the large numbers of fans participating and the parochial patriotic feelings that are stirred up by the atmosphere that surrounds these supporters. i think you also forget the large numbers of players that are decent human beings and contribute to charities, appera at public events and conduct coaching clinics. enough with the doom and gllom, think about the things that make the game great. it is not clooged with ridiculous amounts of players and rules (american football) it is rare that a single player can dominate a whole game start to finish ( happens to often in basketball for my liking) and it is difficult to score a goal, unlike basketball.
there are two goals a field and a ball you dont even need a ref if people want to be honest thats why it remains the greatest game on earth because in its basic form it is the easiest to play.
from 5 months ago
Are you telling me so many football supporters aren't nuts and that Ronaldo is a good role model for our children with his weekly hooker orgies? Common now, I'm not a puritan throwback, but some of the crazy things that happen in the football world simply wouldn't fly in america. Didn't really mean to generalize everybody, but to me it seems that american sports are a lot more wholesome on whole (a fight in their stadiums looks like a tupperware party compared to Seria A fans) and I never hear their athletes doing bad stuff except steroids.
from 5 months ago
Gem,
First and foremost looking for role models in athletics is a bad place anyway. Secondly American athletes are worse than most in many regards; you can read my article All-Time-Felon team whcih is just the best of the best from the NFL alone; not counting the other major sports. It basically reads off like a polics rap sheet including rapes, murders, beatings, domestic violence, high speed police pursuits, drug dealing, larceny, tax evasion, money laundering, etc.
I can't even remember the last time i heard of a soccer player get into trouble other than Ronaldo; and to be quit honest he didnt really do anything that bad; it might be unsettling but not criminal in my opinion.
5 months ago
They will catch on..it's creating a buzz in the US...especially in states like California,Texas,Oklahoma and Florida...as for reaching the World Cup final..the US needs a solid foundation..it needs focus...2030 will perhaps be the year when the US reach the final of WC..
Good Piece Zan,enjoyed the read.
SS
5 months ago
i don't know if they are so squeaky clean, what about the footballer who got shot last year, the guy fighting dogs, various rapes from college to pro ball in all codes, the 'jock' culture of the U.S. is legendary. just because the fans don't fight doesnt mean its all coming up roses over there.
5 months ago
Don't be dissin' Baseball now ...
And Soccer will never be embraced here in the U.S. ... it's furrin.
This is not to say the game has no merit but , my god man, we're already on sensory overload here !
I don't have cable or satellite, get 5 maybe 7 channels on a good night, 3 of 'em PBS, and at 11:30 pm I've got 2 hours of World Series of freakin' POKER on the telly !
You want ball in the hole thrills, chills and ballet watch LAX sometime ... like on Sundays on channel 2 er 8 or which ever. I GET that here on the Shore.
Seriously, think NHL ... wtf ? I don't watch it, but it's on one of my 6 channels and it's truly a great game to watch ... I think.
Sundays the NFL is on my TV as is NCAA on Saturdays. I don't watch, I work. The NFL has become one big beer commercial and truly great games are few and far between. The last AMERICAN Football game I watched was a download from iTunes ... Boise State vs Oklahoma in a bowl game ... 28 minutes from snap, whistle, snap whistle, snap whistle. All action, no commentary, no commercials, no moseying back to the line after a dropped pass, no timeouts. Snap whistle, snap whistle, 28 minutes. Otherwise American football is an excuse to buy extra beer and ignore your wife. Kinda like Soccer.
I'm sure Soccer is a great game as is Golf and Tennis and the NFL, NBA, IRL, WNBA, MMA, WWE ?, Monster Trucks, Xtreme, the Olympics, Spellin' Bees , etc. but how much more can we absorb ?
Soccer has been at it here since Pele defected and we still haven't jumped in with both feet.
Sorry, I just don't have time for another sport.
There is Baseball, there is LAX and there is some kinda vehicle trying to outrun a bunch of other vehicles somewhere. I got no time for Soccer, I work.
from 3 months ago
"some kinda vehicle trying to outrun a bunch of other vehicles somewhere" Oooh, I just love that definition of motorsport, it's glorious.
5 months ago
Hey L.J I like your style. Get drunk and tell the wifey that watching a bunch overpaid young men run and jump and throw and kick balls and discs and pucks around is more important than being "emotionally available" for her. Isn't that really the meaning of all sports?
illya, footballers get shot all the time, usually by retarded fans or refs (see http://johnny-ong.blogspot.com/2007/12/football-referee-pulls-out-gun.html) Rapes are almost a weekly occurance in the premiership, when was the last time that Manchester United hosted a christman party that didn't invovle copious amounts of booze, and attention whores getting raped? Does a week go by that Rio Ferdinand isn't being accused of rape?
I heard about the NFL dog fighting scandal, I must admit that I've never heard of any dog fighting incidents in soccer. But the catfights between their WAGS can get pretty snarky ;)
5 months ago
Why would I ever embrace soccer. Like you said, it is the boringest sport on earth and it requires great endurance, but no athleticism. To me, athleticism requires that you can be touched and not fall down. To me, athleticism requires moving your entire body together. Soccer you run and occassionally kick a ball. Its the dumbest sport ever, and thats why Americans dont like it. The rest of the world loves it because it doesnt require equiptment like sticks or hoops or pads like all the real sports require. Therefore, the poorer nations can play this inferior game with just a ball. THATS why the rest of the world likes soccer, not because its a "beautiful game."
from about 1 month ago
You're not only a fucking idiot, but a perfect example of why the world dislikes america. This "inferior game' is more watched, richer, followed and holds more sway than any other sport on the planet. By a huge margin. If it was "inferior" it wouldn't be the most dominant sport of all time.
4 months ago
loved it - loved it - .... beautiful piece
can you teach me how to hyperlink in text ? i wanna use that to point towards videos
4 months ago
The issue with Americans not embracing soccer has nothing to do with the reasons that initially come to mind. Certainly, soccer can become popular in the US with the right timing and growing interest.
The problem is soccer will always take a backseat to the likes of football, basketball, and, yes, even baseball as long as more runs are scored than goals. It's safe to say that soccer has grown in popularity over the last few years - what with the World Cup and the recent Euro '08 tournament ... and maaaaybe Beckham's American debut, but probably not.
In order for soccer to reach any kind of popularity in the US, fans will need to endure a serious dip in the sports we love. It has to do with the old saying, "don't fix what isn't broken." We love our current sports. We just witnessed possibly the best Super Bowl ever and maybe the best NBA season ever, and we're suddenly going to decide to embrace soccer out of the clear blue sky? Nah, I don't think it'll happen. It is a shame, though.
4 months ago
Soccer and America- does it sound like Tennis in Ethiopia? Well, no! For one, soccer is there in a small way in some of the American States as the kids learn it at school. But of a magnitude where it will replace the American fancy with Football or Baseball, never! Becks was able to get mobbed so perhaps it will catch on sooner than later! Wonderful analysis, Mr.Zander!
from 3 months ago
Was it Becks or Posh? Whatever happened to that Beckham guy?
2 months ago
This is an old article, but I keep returning to it. Now I don't really care if the US takes soccer to heart or not, probably best not, you'd only be another country above England in the FIFA rankings.
I just want to assure some people that yes they could take their family to a Celtic/Rangers game, or to any other match in the UK. Soccer violence is nothing like as common as it was in the 80's, and now as then it is between organised groups who use matches as the focus for confrontation. You are unlikely to see it, and even less likely to be affected.
If you look at the crowds in TV coverage you will see just how many family groups there are, mostly dads and sons, but a fair number of daughters and mums.
Soccer is safe, whatever else you think of it, it is safe.
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