Soulja Boi Tellum to Shut Up!

Eli FuchsContributor IApril 29, 2008

So after listening to endless analysis from Marc Jackson, Charles Barkley, Kenny Smith and others I didn't hear how Soulja Boi was going to impact the NBA Playoffs.  And then it hit me, hes not in the NBA!

 So why am I constantly hearing about him and hearind that damn jingle everytime a miracle happens and DeShawn Stevenson makes a shot?  Because the NBA is now the equivalent of a circus.  It has to be, I mean where else will role-players have the ability to call a player who almost averages a triple-double overrated?

Let me introduce the circus freaks:

DeShawn Stevenson:

Career PPG 8.7, Career RPG 2.4, Career APG 1.9

Brendan Haywood

Career PPG 7.5, Career RPG 5.9, Career APG .5


LeBron James

Career PPG 27.3, Career RPG 6.9, Career 6.6

So what we have here is one player who's career numbers demolish those of two combined players.  Who's talking trash to who?  Of course is the circus freaks from the Washington Wizards.

 DeShawn Stevenson, whos best work stemmed from making 3 pointers with teammate Gilbert Arenas on YouTube with a sandwich in his mouth, is now calling one of the best in the game and maybe ever, OVERRATED?!?!

Arenas had it right, find a way to shut him up and Stevenson may actually be worth a damn.  Then we have Brendan Haywood who apparently is a fill in for the show Entourage, because of his ability to piggyback his wealth from the work of his talented teammates.  In fact, Haywood actually fought a teammate(Etan Thomas) for his hard work and for fear of Thomas showing Coach Eddie Jordan how terrible Haywood really is. 

So people say, Eli, why are you so angry at the NBA and the media?  Well quietly I see a team in the Atlanta Hawks with their soft spoken but hard-working leader Joe Johnson tie up the series with the 1 seed Boston Celtics and get no recognition, no air time and no face time for kids to see. 

I see the Spurs gearing up for another Championship run and yet not a word of trash talk out of anyone's mouth on that team.  But still, every-time I hear Soulja Boi's jingle or his name I wonder if I am watching the NBA Playoffs or MTV garbage.

 Is Carson Daly the new commissioner of the NBA?

At the local YMCA, I recently saw two 10 year old boys playing a game of 1 on 1 before one of my rec league games.  I watched them try over and over pulling the shirt over the head of their opponent before the ball they tossed in the air hit the court. 

Oh, and of course, they were talking more trash in a language only Don King could understand.  I wonder why the US is getting schooled by the world in international tournaments?

So I plead to all those with the ability to make the Jump-shot cool again to do so.  Please make passing an art form.  Please CP3, bring back unselfish basketball.

Thats all the time I have today, I have to call Stuart Scott and tell him that his "Booyahs!" are old and boring!