Re·deem (ri-ˈdēm) verb
1. To make up for; make amends for; offset some fault, shortcoming, etc.
1. An act of redeeming or the state of being redeemed.
The main event of last night's UFC 97: Redemption was a complete joke.
In fact, the title of this article is being very, very generous to both Anderson Silva and Thales Leites. To say that their performances were "lackluster" would be a huge understatement. It would be like calling the Titanic a "minor boating accident."
I was so ticked off last night that once the card went off the air, I immediately logged onto Bleacher Report to voice my disappointment. To quote the movie Step Brothers, I felt like I was "on Planet Bullshit in the galaxy of This Sucks Camel D*ck."
I was that mad.
It seems as though most, if not all, of the fans out there share my disapproval. However, their negativity seems to be directed more toward Leites than Silva. While I can understand this completely, since Leites fought like a total p*ssy, I can't help but be even more disgusted with Silva.
Granted, Leites was constantly dropping to the mat like some sort of narcoleptic moron, but I'm convinced that Silva could have finished the fight on several occasions. He simply chose not to. Some argue that Silva was trying to engage the entire time the fight was standing, but I beg to differ.
To help support my opinion, please direct your attention to the following images as I attempt to analyze the bizarre repertoire of stand-up techniques that Silva displayed last night.
1. Ahhh yes, the dreaded "Tiger Claw Thigh Strike." As we all know, this technique is one of the most feared strikes in the Muay Thai handbook. In fact, Muay Thai fighters often formulate their entire gameplan around this devastating maneuver. Notice Silva's pinpoint accuracy. You are witnessing a true martial artist in action.
2. Here, Silva is demonstrating a technique known as the "Rabona." This kick originated in the widely popular sport of soccer, and has been made famous by Silva's fellow countryman, Ronaldinho. Look at how well Silva adapts this technique to MMA, as he uses it to spin his opponent around 360 degrees. Simply amazing.
3. This technique is called the "Chicken Man Side Kick." It is very similar to the "Tiger Claw Thigh Strike," but as you notice, Silva is striking with his heel as opposed to a closed fist. This lower-body strike is often accompanied by a loud "Hiyaa!" and is responsible for roughly 32 percent of all knockouts in MMA. Based on those statistics, it is no wonder Silva chose to utilize it as often as he did.
4. Last but not least, we have the "Shake and Bake Quadruple Shimmy." It is very common in the Brazilian Samba Dance, as well as with people suffering from Tourette's Syndrome. Here, Silva uses it to distract his opponent before unleashing one of the five or six punches he threw all night.
In all seriousness, Silva did not look like a man who was trying to defeat his opponent. The only "engaging" he did was engaging in jackassery, and in no way was this fight "Redemption" of any kind. I really don't know what else to say other than...
Silva, you SUCK, ya Jackass.
Thank you to mma-core.com for providing the images.
No thank you to Anderson Silva and Thales Leites for stealing $44.95 from my checking account and 25 minutes from my life.
"The saddest thing in life is wasted talent."
-A Bronx Tale