There's an old cartoon in which Bugs Bunny takes on the Gashouse Gorillas all by himself. He plays every position, throws an incredible slow ball, and has the speed and agility to scale the Statue of Liberty in order to catch a towering fly ball.
He does all this and never gets hurt.
The Mets need him.
While every Mets fan north of the equator applauded the Johan Santana trade, the lack of first base and right-handed offensive depth is now the team's biggest problem.
Carlos Delgado, old at 35, seems to break his hip every time he slips getting out of the tub.
Moises Alou, older at 41, should call his uncle Jesus and ask for a miracle to quickly cure his hernia.
Orlando "El Duque" Hernandez, now 77, is on a waiting list for a right foot transplant.
Ryan Church has a concussion. Brian Schneider tweaked a hamstring. Marlon Anderson—who gave Church the concussion—is ailing.
Endy Chavez hasn't played yet. Carlos Beltran hasn't played yet. Luis Castillo hasn't played yet.
The star of camp thus far has been Angel Pagan (who can maybe fill in for Jesus Alou if he can't be found at a local Ryan Church).
Angel is a former castoff. Is he good enough to backup the injured (and lefty batting) Chavez on opening day? Can Chavez stay healthy all year?
Na-na-na-na nineteen-year-old Fernando Martinez, who started camp saying he'd be up this year—count on it!—may be called up sooner than we all thought, and hoped.
What to do? We can make a trade.
But who do we trade? Joe Smith?
I read in one blog that someone suggested we trade Church and Schneider to the Nationals for Lastings Milledge (right handed bat).
I'll call it now: What we did to Minnesota for Johan is what Washington did to the Mets for Milledge. Only, Milledge will probably be a Jose Guillen/Milton Bradley type of guy. Big mouth. Big on the field. Can't stay in one organization longer than two years.
There's plenty of time before the regular season ends and still time before it begins.
Kenny Lofton, Sammy Sosa, Reggie Sanders...these are some outfield free agents. Last year's backup first baseman, Shawn Green, has basically retired. Preston Wilson is still out there, too.
There are options within and options without.
But it appears the Mets will start the year without full health. And that's why the signing of Bugs Bunny could have been this offseason's biggest deal.
6 comments Last one added about 1 year ago — Leave a Comment
Steve Hartline about 1 year ago
slide DiMaggio, slide!
Reggie Sanders is a great one year pickup, and has been productive in that capacity since cars quit running on leaded gas, so signing him would make sense in the outfield. First base is another story, and would take some creativity from the front office.
Edit Comment Cancel
Ted Williams about 1 year ago
The gas house gang was overrated.
Edit Comment Cancel
Anonymous about 1 year ago
How could you miss this? The #1 question asked every day in camp: "What's up, doc?"
Edit Comment Cancel
David Philp about 1 year ago
Now I'm mad at myself for missing that! Nice catch, Anonymous.
Edit Comment Cancel
John Fennelly about 1 year ago
Ha ha....very funny. It is, I'm not kidding
Edit Comment Cancel
Renatto Cobos about 1 year ago
We need an angel in the outfield
Edit Comment Cancel
Leave a Comment
You must register to post a comment.