NFL Picks: Week Two Seems Like There Will Be Some Obvious Winners

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Raiders fans will readily concur with the fact that I have officially become an idiot.

I am posting my picks for today's games and will undoubtedly be so blatantly wrong on some of these picks, it will prompt calls for my trips to work to be taken on the yellow bus for my own safety.

I figured it was only fair after I called out a couple of writers for being stupid (I was correct, by the way) that I put myself out there to be humiliated.

What the hell? This will be fun!

Houston Texans at Tennessee Titans

After getting smothered at home by the Jets, the Texans go on the road to get smothered by the Titans as well.

Expect: Tennessee's defense will hammer the Texans offensive attack and bring home the win. Easily.

New Orleans Saints at Philadelphia Eagles

The Eagles are one point underdogs at home to the Saints, but that's only because quarterback Donovan McNabb is out.

Expect: The leagues best quarterback, the Saints' Drew Brees, will continually step up in the pocket to evade the Eagles' futile pass rush, and do just enough to squeak past the Eagles... then run to the bus.

New England Patriots at New York Jets

Out of respect, the Patriots are 3.5 point favorites to roll into New York and continue their dominance against the Jets.

Expect: Two words come to mind when I think of the Patriots defense: a) Old b) Slow

That's probably wrong, because all those lead footed linebackers are out in New England.

Jets head coach Rex Ryan knows what to throw at Patriots QB Tom Brady to get him rattled. Unfortunately, Bill Belichick has mastered young QB's over the years. It seems obvious that Jets rookie QB Mark Sanchez will struggle.

I'm still picking the Jets to upset the Patriots, but only because they may still be shaking off the rust.

Cincinnati Bengals at Green Bay Packers

Somebody's offense isn't as good as advertised based on last week's performance by both teams.

Expect: Green Bay to not live up to their lofty status as nine point favorites over the Bengals. It will be a close game, but Green Bay pulls out a close one at home.

Oakland Raiders at Kansas City Chiefs

Oakland is somehow a three point underdog to the Chiefs and they aren't going to be happy about that.

Expect: Complete dominance by the Raiders on both sides of the ball. The Raiders offensive line has nothing to worry about from the Chiefs' pass rush and shutting down the Raiders run game could prove difficult.

Defensive linemen Richard Seymour and Greg Ellis will dominate the line of scrimmage.

Arizona Cardinals at Jacksonville Jaguars

In Arizona the Cardinals would likely mop up the Jaguars, but they are three point road underdogs this week.

Expect: The Jaguars roll over my hometown squad as they start the season 0-2 thanks to Maurice Jones-Drew.

Minnesota Vikings at Detroit Lions

The Lions, who haven't won a game since I saw Aunt Bea, are huge 9.5 point underdogs in this division rivalry game.

Expect: The Lions to thunderously drop to 0-19.

That's incredible.

However, the Lions may prove me wrong. On about four of those six Drew Brees touchdown passes, the Lions almost got to Drew Brees. Their might not be another QB playing today that could have made those throws that Brees made.

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