Well, I hope the people of Houston are happy.
After half a decade of enduring one losing season after another, the Texans have finally "taken action" by releasing their unsuccessful leader, David Carr.
The move has been eagerly anticipated for weeks—not because Carr was controversial in any way, but because those of us with functioning, well-evolved brains couldn't wait to see which ludicrous move the inept Texans leadership would make next.
Now we can all rejoice.
We can rejoice because our own favorite teams will not finish dead last for the next few seasons. We can rejoice because those smug Lonestar Staters will have to live this one down for a while. We can rejoice because our thoughts will not be clouded by the "Should our team tank it and win the top draft pick?" question next year.
Thank you, Texans, for making it all possible.
It was less than a year ago when we all read The Headline. You know, that one about how the folks in Houston had agreed to terms with Mario Williams. If you were like me, you immediately checked your calendar to ensure that it wasn't April Fools Day.
Sure enough, that move played out just as every person over the age of six predicted: Williams was an average rookie DE who played hard but did not meet expectations. Reggie Bush, by contrast, demonstrated consistent flashes of brilliance and was a major contributor to the best season in Saints history.
But that's last year.
This year we got to follow, with excitement, the David Carr saga. Let's summarize it for a moment:
David Carr is an extremely talented quarterback who has been surrounded by some of the most god-awful non-talents in the league. He's had one receiver. He's had no healthy running back. He's had a miserable offensive line.
But somehow—somehow—he's managed to put up very solid numbers.
His QB rating was a rock-solid 82.1 in 2006. That put him at number 15 in the league, or slightly above average. He also completed a phenomenal 68 percent of his passes—the very best in the NFL. Number one. Number fricken ONE. Better than Peyton Manning. Better than Tony Romo. Numero Uno.
And those impressive stats came under a heavy burden. How heavy? The man got sacked 41 times. Carr endured some of the worst punishment the AFC could mete out. The only quarterbacks in the AFC who got sacked more played for Oakland, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, and Buffalo—and it's pretty safe to say that David Carr is a full order of magnitude better than those passers.
But it gets so much worse than that. Typically, a bruised and battered QB can hand the ball off to a reasonably competent running back and expect to share the burden. Not the case for Mr. Carr.
Last season, his top rushing teammate was Ron Dayne. Did Dayne get an impressive 1500 yards? Nope. Did he get a very solid 1200? Nope. How about 1000 yards, the traditional benchmark of a respectable season?
Not even close.
Ron Dayne managed a measly 612 yards in 2006, and barely eclipsed four per carry. That's hardly the type of support that enables a quarterback to helm a winning team.
Think Reggie Bush may have come in handy?
Let's face it: With the exception of Andre Johnson, can anybody name a single talented man on the Texans' roster? Not likely.
The fact is that David Carr is one of the most talented and underrated players in the NFL. If his team failed, then it was because Houston's leadership assembled a not-so-supporting cast of has-beens and never-weres.
The Texans lost one battle after another, and the leadership responded by beheading the lone general of worth. Smart.
Wherever Carr lands after this—and there will be many teams interested in his talents—the man will be better off. The Houston Texans are an organization so wretched that it's hard to imagine enduring an entire five years with them.
Look for David Carr to revive his career somewhere—anywhere. Rest assured: He'll get the last laugh...and hopefully it'll be just as hard as the one bestowed upon us by this joke of an organization.