50 Reasons the UFC Is Better Than the WWE

Wikipedia defines professional wrestling as a "mode of spectacle, combining athletics and theatrical performance."

Mixed martial arts, in contrast, is defined as "a full contact combat sport that allows a wide variety of fighting techniques and skills, from a mixture of other combat sports, to be used in competitions."

Yeah, that sounds way better.

"Combining athletics and theatrical performance?" Who said we want Michael Jordan running around quoting Shakespeare?

The choice is quite obvious, if you ask me. If you are not convinced, allow me to elaborate...

* Author's note: For WWE fans—the intention is to poke a little fun at the WWE and spark some debate. I apologize that I cannot respond to every comment. For those wondering if there is a counter article, there is: here—although don't believe what he has to say about UFC not having competition...

Wrestling with a Purpose

If you want physical theatrics, you are better off investigating performance art than the WWE.

Cirque du Soleil is more expressive and impressive by almost any measure compared to professional wrestling.

Arianny Celeste

For guys that like women. If you know what I mean.

Brittney Palmer

As a friend says:

"Every slideshow needs a little Brittney."

Dominick Cruz

Little-known fact: Ninjas developed their movement by going into the future and watching tapes of Dominick Cruz.

Jose Aldo

"Scarface" may be little, but he hits like a man twice his size.

If you ever see him not smiling...I suggest you run for your life.

Frankie Edgar

A 155-lb. Energizer bunny programmed to beat the crap out of anything opposite him in the cage.

BJ Penn

The UFC has a bloodthirsty Hawaiian called "The Prodigy."

He does not lick the blood of his opponents to impress the crowd; he does it subconsciously because of an ancient Hawaiian warrior tradition.

And because he just goes a little crazy.

Thiago Alves

Thiago Alves has an insatiable desire to punch and knee things until they stop moving.

The UFC lets him do that.

Jon Fitch

You think WWE guys are tough? Jon Fitch eats nails for breakfast.

Kidding—I think he actually might be a vegetarian.

Whatever, Fitch is still tougher than you and your daddy combined.

Georges St-Pierre

He's Canadian, and he'll mop the floor with you.

What, are you going to cry about it?

Brian Stann

Brian Stann does not parade an American flag around because he thinks it will sell tickets. 

Brian Stann parades an American flag around because he is a legitimate American war hero.

Chael Sonnen

Not all UFC fighters can smack talk as well as WWE guys, but Chael Sonnen actually talks smack talk BETTER than the WWE guys.

And then he backs it up.

Rich Franklin

Cincinnati school teacher Rich Franklin decided to take up cage fighting, and he is more respected for it than if it had been professional wrestling.

Anderson Silva

Nobody in the WWE has mastered the five "D"s of dodgeball like UFC middleweight champion Anderson Silva has.

Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive and Dodge.

He also treats professional fighters like they were his children.

Lyoto Machida

It is no gimmick—this guy really is a karate master.

Homeboy also sumo wrestles.

Quinton "Rampage" Jackson

UFC fighters can be controversial and without any formal training.

Plus, Jackson will knock you out.

Jon Jones

You want to watch a real suplex? 

Watch light-heavyweight champion Jon Jones throw around the competition.

Roy Nelson

He may be tubby, but Roy Nelson would stomp those WWE clowns into the ground.

Junior dos Santos

The UFC's No.1 heavyweight contender is like a Brazilian Mike Tyson.

Except he can take down NCAA wrestling champions as well...

Cain Velasquez

The heavyweight champ has been steamrollin' fools.

Not even Brock Lesnar could last a round with this guy.

Cocky Brits

Michael Bisping and Dan Hardy are exciting fighters and cocky Brits.

They know how to stir the pot, even if not consciously. It's as natural as breathing.

Cheick Kongo vs. Pat Barry

A few weeks ago, we were treated to one of the greatest fighting spectacles of the year, and it was completely unscripted! How about that?

Heavyweight kickboxer Pat Barry almost knocked out fellow kickboxer Cheick Kongo, only to be stretched out and unconscious from a vicious Kongo uppercut 20 seconds later.

Chris Leben vs. Yoshihiro Akiyama

An Oregon skater dude vs. a Japanese celebrity.

No, that is not an arcade game—it is the UFC.

These guys knocked each other silly for almost three full rounds before Leben submitted the Judo black belt with a triangle choke.

You just cannot find that kind of nonstop action in the WWE.

Forrest Griffin vs. Stephan Bonnar

Almost universally recognized as the most pivotal fight in UFC history, Griffin vs. Bonnar happened all the way back in 2005.

This fight helped launch the UFC brand into society on a broad level, and it was completely through the organic evolution of the sport. No scripts here, buddy.

Frank Mir vs. Brock Lesnar 1

Despite being an elite athlete, when Brock Lesnar first met Frank Mir, he had yet to fully develop into a mixed martial artist.

Mir showed how green Lesnar was by submitting him in a minute-and-a-half.

Chuck Liddell

After the legendary Chuck Liddell retired, the UFC showed its loyalty by promoting him to a VP position.

VP of...I dunno, walking around in T-shirts and being awesome (still, reporting to Dana White).

The Rubber Guard

The rubber guard is like being in the deathly clutches of a giant octopus.

A professional wrestler would be as lost in a rubber guard as a child in a porn shop.

Real Arm Locks

The phrase is "tap or snap."

This is real danger, and there are real consequences.

Real Chokes

It is tap out or black out, my friend.

Kicks

Do the WWE guys even throw kicks?

I hope not. That's like an elephant doing ballet.

Gettin' Rocked

The thing with real punches is that they hurt, and they scramble your brain.

That gives us such wonderful things as flash KOs, rubber legs and the stanky leg.

Knockouts

"BOOM goes the dynamite!"

Nothing speaks louder to the winner/loser dynamic than a fighter sprawled out on the canvas—completely unconscious.

The Octagon

WWE thinks it is an extra special occasion to put guys inside a cage.

UFC guys cage fight on the daily, son.

The Ultimate Fighter

The UFC's longstanding reality show The Ultimate Fighter is pretty awesome.

Two UFC stars coach opposite each other on teams of up-and-coming prospective UFC fighters.

At the end of it all, they fight. Fo realz.

Herb Dean

Have you seen some of those WWE referees? They are always getting distracted and never properly enforcing the rules.

Totally unprofessional.

Lorenzo Fertitta

The more "hands on" of the Fertitta brothers, Lorenzo is totally jacked up.

I bet the UFC CEO could wrestle in the WWE just for funzies.

Steven Seagal

If Steven Seagal is not one of your biggest heroes, then you are a meat puppet devoid of convictions and comprised of compromised values.

A recurring face at UFC events and fighter camps, Steven Seagal will take you to the bank. The blood bank.

Joe Rogan

Who does the WWE announcing?

The UFC has Fear Factor host, TV personality, martial artist and stand-up comedian Joe Rogan.

Mangled Faces

Sure, WWE has blood too, but it cannot compete with the carnage of the UFC.

These guys do not choose where to get cut. They just fight and cuts happen.

Upsets

What is so interesting about a predetermined outcome?

When two UFC fighters step into the cage, you can genuinely be shocked. Like, in actual real time.

Authentic Feuds

I hardly want to pay attention to the quibbles of a real squabble, let alone fake ones.

Real Emotions

There is not much "mugging" for the audience in the UFC because there is no need for it.

Genuine emotion trumps all.

More International Flare

World Wrestling Entertainment has fans worldwide, but the Ultimate Fighting Championship is the truly international brand.

Aside from its roster boasting a host of international stars, the UFC holds major events outside the United States on the regular.

Legitimate Champions

I never understood why the WWE crowned "champions."

What's the point of a champion if the competition is fake?

In the UFC, fighters are crowned champions because, you know, they are defeating the highest level of competition.

Dana White > Vince McMahon

Dana White could beat Vince McMahon up.

Plus, there is none of this.

PPV Success

In 2009, the UFC had 11 of the top 15 pay-per-view buy rates.

The gap has only been widening since then.

Olympic Transplants

Between wrestling, judo and on rare occasion boxing, there are a ton of Olympians to cross over to MMA.

Off the top of my head, pro wrestling has Kurt Angle, and even he acknowledges the awesomeness of MMA by way of his character in the upcoming film Warrior.

Internet Communities

GIFs, shooping, memes and exploitation—no other brand of sports has as creative and ingenious Internet communities as MMA.

Your Own Destiny

MMA is the ultimate individual sport, and you are the master of your own destiny by virtue of your performance.

Contrast that with the WWE, where you are only a pawn at the bidding of McMahon and that is all there is to it.

Brock Lesnar

Even though it was paying him a lot more money, Brock Lesnar left professional wrestling because it was not fulfilling.

He needed real competition, like a man.

He needed a real test, like a man.

If he ever goes back to professional wrestling, it will be to retire. *yawn*