The Top-10 Things That Will Happen During or After Tonight's Season Opener

I don’t know about you, but I’m thinking that it’s going to take me a little while to realize that the 'Skins/Giants matchup isn’t a preseason game. I've watched entirely too much preseason football.

One of the biggest differences between a preseason game and a regular-season one are the things that are talked about before, during, and after the game.

Some things most people just don't like to talk about during the preseason, as I’m sure you noticed when you tried to tell anyone who would listen why you thought R.W. McQuarters was in for a comeback season for the ages. 

Hey, why don't you stop playing franchise mode in Madden for a while?

While sitting at my desk this morning, counting the seconds until I would be out of work, I decided to put together a Top-10 list of things that will most certainly happen during or in the aftermath of tonight’s season opener. And by most certainly, I mean maybe.

Jason Campbell will be dropped from approximately 675,000 fantasy teams nationwide Friday morning, despite managing to have a pretty decent game.

We are nothing if not a nation who loves to overreact on things.

Tatum Bell will be brought up at some point, followed by an awkward silence as the announcers aren't quite sure how to deal with the topic.

This is a wild card for sure, but I wanted to throw in a surprise or two.  

Michael Strahan and Osi Umenyiora will be mentioned approximately 27 times.

Sure, the loss of the two will have huge ramifications, but the announcers will likely ignore most of the actual happenings in-game in order to discuss this in detail.

Regardless of the game result, some New York newspaper will manage to post a pessimistic article.

This would actually be a mortal lock everyday, but I figured I’d highlight it since I couldn’t think of anything else to put here.

Whoever loses will give us a better perspective on which team has pole position for last place in the NFC East, both literally and seasonally.

I, for one, think it’s pretty clear that the Cowboys and Eagles are the top two teams in the division. Barring injuries or...injuries, the Redskins and Giants could end up battling for third place. Good times!

Multiple owners of any of the Giants' three top RBs (Derrick Ward, Brandon Jacobs, and Ahmad Bradshaw) will go certifiably insane.

Hey, don’t look at me; you’re the one’s who drafted them.

The world will be introduced to at least two new Peyton Manning commercials.

I know this joke was killed about eight months ago, but I plan to use it up until the day I die.

Tom Brady’s foot will be brought up at least 16 times.

Even though there’s precisely no concrete info on the topic, NFL game announcers certainly are suckers for the big-name injury rumor.  

Tom Coughlin’s facial complexion will be monitored closely.

I would like to add to that that shots from last year's playoff game against Green Bay will also be shown. Comparisons between the two colors could likely be made.

Due to a mixture of pure joy that the NFL season has begun and having lost their tolerance during such a long offseason, the majority of workers on Friday morning will be incredibly hung over.

Nothing like whiskey at 11:00 on a work night! Woo-hoo!