Manning To Sit Out AFC Title Game In Prep For Super Bowl

INDIANAPOLIS — Indianapolis Colts back-up quarterback, Curtis Painter was named the starter in Sunday’s AFC Championship game against the New York Jets, in a move designed to prepare the Colts for the Super Bowl.

“The AFC Championship game was never our ultimate goal,” Colts Head Coach Jim Caldwell said. “We need to save our guys for The Super Bowl, that’s what we’ve said all year and that’s what we’re going to do. No matter what.” 

When reminded that they have to win Sunday to get to the Super Bowl, Caldwell appeared — at least outwardly — unconcerned, “We’ll do what we feel is best for this organization. The media, fans and logic don’t make the decisions around here. We do.”

NFL MVP and Colts starter, Peyton Manning expressed disappointment when he heard of the decision, “I was really looking forward to getting some reps on Sunday and the Jets might have been good for that.”

Though disappointed, Manning still sided with his coach and team president Bill Polian, “I know how it looks, but I trust Jim and Bill,” Manning said.

Polian was unavailable for comment yesterday but was seen, according to reports, walking around the Colts complex yesterday dressed in shorts, flip-flops, and an old tank top that said 'Miami Beach Sex Patrol, K-9 Doggystyle Unit.' 

“I’m not worried," Manning continued, "In fact, Bill told me I don't even have to stick around for the game, I can just leave for Miami now — which I though was pretty cool of him.” 

In light of the Colts surprise decision, the pressure of getting the Indianapolis (not Baltimore) Colts to their second-ever Super Bowl falls squarely on the unheralded shoulders of Painter. 

A fact that doesn’t seem to bother Caldwell in the slightest, “If Curtis plays like we know he can, we’ve got nothing to worry about. And even if he doesn’t, well then at least it won’t be Peyton’s fault.”

Painter, for his part, isn’t quite as confident as his coach and fellow quarterback Manning, “The Jets looked pretty tough last week against San Diego and Rivers," Painter remarked. "I’m really hoping our defense has a big game.”

Painter’s lack of confidence could stem from his relief appearance against the Jets in Week 16 where he went 4-11 for 44 yards and one pick in the process of blowing a 15-0 lead and the Colts chances of an undefeated season.

“I really wasn’t planning on playing this (AFC Championship) game,” Painter explained, “I told Coach Caldwell I’m slightly nervous about starting and he told that he makes the decisions around here.”

“So, yeah. I guess I’ll have to play. It’ll be fine. I’ll be fine,” Painter said before having a stress-induced sneezing spell. “I can’t wait to play, real excited.”

Jets coach Rex Ryan, like Manning, Caldwell and Polian, seemed good with the choice of Painter. “It’s not my call but, I’m sure Curtis will give us a hell of a fight, “ Ryan said before laughing hysterically and coughing up pieces of the reuben sandwich he had for lunch.

Asked if the switch of Manning to Painter would cause him to change his own strategy, Ryan replied that he might "blitz every single down." 

In addition to Manning getting the week off, star defensive ends Dwight Freeney and Robert Mathis are apparently not playing either.

Mathis was nowhere in sight after yesterday's practice and Freeney didn’t take questions. But after packing up his locker, Freeney did leave a handwritten sign that said, ‘See ya in Miami suckers!’ 

Through all the controversy Manning, ever the good solider, seemed genuinely eager to get to the Super Bowl for the second time in his career. "It's really a dream come true. Honestly, I just can't wait to play again. Although, that'll depend on what Jim and Bill think."