Today in Sports, Nothing Happened

Dateline, Tampa Bay, Florida, Feb 1, 2009 - Today in sports, there wasn't a lot to report in the football front. San Diego reported to having fired Norv Turner after 2 seasons of confusion, while the GM simply called it "a shakeup".

The media also reported, that Dallas was trying to negotiate a deal to send either multiple picks, or players, to New England, in an effort to secure Randy Moss. In Romo's words: "something has to work, eventually"...

Speaking of the Patriots, Bill Belichick was released from the hospital, after swallowing a mic during a heated exchange with a ref, he was heard squeaking from his teammates, and after videotape was found, the offending foam was removed.

The New York Giants, one year removed from the Lombardi Trophy, made another spirited run to the playoffs, only to be beaten by the one thing they couldn't handle.

Home field.

The Colts, meanwhile, are retooling, after a surprising exit. After eliminating the Patriots, they were shocked coming into the AFC Championship Game, Peyton was forced into bad passes, before finally being knocked from the game by being sandwiched between an opposing player, and his own RB. The RB Addai was unhurt.

And in Hockey, Joe Sakic finally retires, ending a long and fruitful Career, for the Colorado Avalanche, after last year's spirited drive to the cup. He'll take over coaching duties on the team, Quinnville felt it was the right thing to do...

Basketball highlights, Celtics win again, continue their winning ways after last season's return to respectability. At the present pace, only 2 winning records stand in front of the Celtics: The Chicago Bulls, and the Lakers.

In Horse Racing, Mr Zito, long known as the skilled trainer in racing horses, finally went to pasture, citing health reasons, and fed up with the horse dung.

In Bowling, 3 people in one tournament set records, of bowling 300 games, in the same round, then gave it a twist, each lost the following round, by bowling less than half that.

In Cricket, England wins a landmark game over France, the french coach immediately demands an investigation, claiming all the players are on steroids...

In hard tip Darts, London, a man successfully has dart lodged in his skull removed, then uses it to hit 20 to win the European finals.

Other news:

Page 4, Racing

Page 8, team water polo drowns

Page 12, John McEnroe, has racket from wife removed

Page 16, Fold out section on water softeners

Page 20, back page, some team from Oakland won the super bowl. Need to verify rumor....