Dion Waiters was the victim of a heinous crime. His car was loaded with popcorn and the monsters who did it failed to leave him a beverage to wash it down with.
Oh, the horror.
The combo guard didn't appear all that happy with the result. He claimed he was angry and that it looked worse (not "worst") in person.
Bleacher Report @BleacherReport
Cavs rookie @dionwaiters3 was the victim of some rookie hazing from his teammates http://t.co/DUcAB96n0y2013-3-31 17:43:17
I'm not quite sure if he was referring to the amount of popcorn in his car or if he was livid that his co-workers couldn't conspire to pull off a more original prank.
In September, Deron Williams, Reggie Evans and the Brooklyn Nets' band of veterans filled sophomore Marshon Brooks' car with popcorn as well. Apparently, the lockout-truncated season didn't present the team with enough of an opportunity to haze the then rookie properly. So he was popcorned just prior to this campaign as well.
Imagine rolling up to your expensive set of wheels only to find it flush with popcorn. What would you do? Go to the movies? Purchase some salt? Hire Eddy Curry to clean it out for you?
While we're fantasizing, also envision yourself as an NBA player plotting a practical joke like this. Wouldn't you have been at least a teensy bit more creative?
I love the idea of a vehicle overflowing with feature film-inspired snacks as much as the next person, but if the Cavs couldn't have come up with another gag, they could've at least changed the type of chow. Like to Cheetos or Milk Duds or Skittles. Or even unpopped kernels. Anything that didn't scream I stole Deron Williams' diary would've sufficed, really.
We can all appreciate some good-natured satire, save for maybe Waiters himself. These types of pranks are funny and only slightly destructive.
To the next NBA convocation that contemplates punking a teammate like this though, I beg you: Don't.
Fill their automobile with a different treat, or do something else entirely. No one likes a copycat.
Especially one who forgot the soda.