NFL Competition Committee, Sshh the QB Is Playing: Fireman Ed Is On Notice

Max Jet FanContributor IMarch 31, 2009

The tremendous intellect of the NFL's Competition Committee is again making the fun of watching football even more enjoyable by implementing the "Sshh the QB is Playing" rule.

All eight members of the committee agreed that it is just too noisy for the Quarterback to call plays, or even just play. After a extensive investigation the committee has found that noise does distract the QB from calling the play, executing the play, and figuring out when the play is whistled dead.

In accordance with the rest of the QB protective rules all fans must now be quiet whenever a QB is on the field. If any noises are made that fan will be removed without warning and have their season tickets taken away(if applicable).

The committee is reviewing a extension of the new rule, called the 12th man rule. If this rule passes a team can choose to:

A: Let their fans cheer throughout the game
B: Put a 12th player on the field

If the team chooses "B" that player can not touch the QB, or even look in his/her direction.

 

The "Sshh the QB is Playing" rule causes quite a dilemma when a team is running the Wild Cat offense. Is the RB now the QB and do the rules apply to them? Can you tackle the RB from the ground if a direct snap has occurred? Just something to ponder.

Specific chants, such as the J-E-T-S, JETS JETS JETS, are banned all together. The committee realized that such chants could bring the opposing teams Quarterback spirit down and therefore these chants are deemed unsafe for the QB's psyche.

If these types of chants are heard the opposing team will be rewarded 6 points and the QB will be given one xanax per instance. The committee is encouraging fans to keep rooting, but they must be quiet about it.

Furthermore visual fan distractions are also banned. For the likes of Hogettes, and The Barrel Man, proper football attire is required. Proper football attire is specified as wearing any of the two teams playing merchandise. I agree with this one, don't you just hate it when people wear a Giants jersey to a Jets - Dolphins game?

The visual distraction rule was mainly put into effect for Eli Manning and the Hoggettes. Rumor has it that Eli could not keep his eyes off the Hoggetes founder Michael Torbert. Eli tried to cour Mr. Torbert, but much to his chagrin Mr. Torbert was already linked to another sow (Sow=adult female swine).

I look forward to this upcoming season, I am already practicing my air clapping.

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