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When the NFL lockout ended, fans all over the world rejoiced. Wives and girlfriends everywhere wept. For them, the NFL season meant months of Sundays, Mondays, sometimes Thursdays and sometimes Saturday mornings filled with noisy televisions, beer bellies and the dreaded fantasy football leagues.
If you happen to be a guy who's with a chick that is into football and actually likes watching the game, I hate you. If you're like the rest of us, I've worked tirelessly to come up with a way to get your female football-hating friend to ease up on you.
First, use the Kardashians. Instead of telling your wife about Reggie Bush's amazing run (trust me, she couldn't care less about Bush), you need to tell her something like, "I can't believe Reggie Bush is getting back with Kim Kardashian." That will get her attention. Keep up with who the NFL players are dating and keep your main squeeze up-to-date, as well.
It helps, trust me.
Then, focus on a player that she may have a secret crush on—say, Tom Brady or Aaron Rodgers. Then take the next step, which is a biggie. Start a fantasy football league with family and family friends. You know, the sister-in-law, your 12-year-old cousin, etc.
You need to include her in the league and make sure she lands one of those guys that she may have a crush on. It will take time, but little by little, she will ask you, "How did my team do?" Try to get some people that she's competitive with in the league—maybe a sister or her best friend.
The next thing you know, she will be screaming at the television right along with you on Sundays.
Fellas, don't push against her dislike of the NFL: it's an immovable force. Instead, bring her walls down, one season at a time by including her. Just make sure she doesn't think you're doing it for a selfish reason or all bets are off.
And yes, I know Reggie is getting back with Kim because I'm keeping my wife involved in any way I can.
By. All. Means. Necessary.