So You Think You Can Start a Football League?

Chris YowAnalyst IDecember 9, 2008

Michael Vick—do not lie to me and tell me you think he deserves a second chance. Nobody thinks Vick deserves a second chance. Except maybe somebody in the upstart United Football League.

What's the United Football League? Just the next failed football league to come to town. Remember the AAFL? The league even had a draft! Let's hope this fledgling league that has already postponed it's season once decides to close shop before making a fool of themselves with a draft.

Nonetheless, Marc Cuban and a few other pretty wealthy guys, well Cuban was wealthy, how did that whole insider trading thing come out? Who cares? This isn't going to be worth my time anyway.

The UFL has decided that instead of the traditional, other league idea, they are going to play their football games in the fall. Good luck, fellas.

Here's some advice: Don't listen to Donald Trump—he'll get you $2 in an anti-trust suit against the NFL.

The last successful "other league" was the USFL, that is if you are not counting the Arena Football League. The USFL had everything going in their favor. Big crowds, big names and big money pouring in, and let's not forget refs that wore shorts! Then Trump opens his blasted mouth.

Mark Cuban seems like that kind of person to me. I don't know if he'll be running the show or if he's only got a little money involved, but he'll find a way to be hands-on. That can't be good for trying to find officials.

The UFL claims they are, "Where the future stars play." I assume they feel they can find better players than NFL Europa and the plethora of guys that are playing in my local YMCA league.

Oh, yeah! They got Michael Vick. Or if you let league commissioner Michael Huyghue tell the story it's a 98 percent chance the league will sign him.

You don't even have teams, coaches, GM's...and you're signing Vick already?! Well, 98 percent chance you're signing him? Please.

I hope there's a team in Virginia and they play all of their games at home, else you'll need a good back up to play the road games. Those ankle bracelets are no joke.
The UFL website boasts that they will, "offer real, 11-on-11, outdoor professional football." It's sad that they would have to jab at the Arena Football League to make themselves feel better.

Don't expect this league to produce more than laughs or criticism. They are projecting a team in Monterrey, Mexico. Okay, the NFL in London is bad enough, but Mexico? If you've never seen drunk, hungover football—there's your chance.

Are you going to play a bunch of Mexican citizens? Or does this league honestly think they can persuade a football player to play in that sort of weather and in that environment? You guys got another thing coming.

The best part? Their games will be on Thursday and Friday nights. No more UAB vs. Montana on ESPN on Thursdays, now it's the Los Angeles Where Did Mark Cuban's Money Go's against the Hartford I Hope That Financial Company With Our Name Can Bail Us Outs.

Honestly, if I was in California on a Friday night, I'd go watch Mater Dei or De La Salle play high school football. At least it would be worth the price of admission. Not to mention they're not going to fold.

Good luck, UFL. You're gonna need it.