Slovakia Hammers Bulgaria 82-0—Women's Hockey Looks Like College Football

Matthew IrbySenior Analyst ISeptember 10, 2008

The University of Texas Longhorns defeated the small school of UT-Tyler 82-0 in college football this Saturday in Austin, wait, that's right.

The University of Slovakia men's football team defeated the Fighting Bulgarian team 82-0 in an exhibition game...nope, not correct either.

Oh yeah, how about the Slovakian Women's National Hockey team defeated the Bulgarian Women's National Hockey team 82-0 in an Olympic qualifying match for the 2010 Vancouver Games.

Are you freaking kidding me?!?

Unlike my Michael Phelps article that fooled many of y'all, this one is legit.

The hockey match, and I'm using that word very loosely, took place last night in Latvia, Eastern Europe.

In the 60-minute match the Slovakians out shot the Bulgarians 139-0.  Fourteen different players scored at least one goal.  The high scorers were Janka Culikova with 10 goals and Martina Velickova with nine goals.

This "good old-fashioned college football whooping"-type game was seen by a grand total of 37 spectators.  Team Slovakia average a goal every 44 seconds.

Slovakia won the five team qualifying group and moved on to another group, attempting to qualify for the Olympic Games.  Obviously the Bulgarians were eliminated as they lost all five matches and were outscored 1-192.

For the Bulgarians hockey team, that was started not even a year ago, this was the final game of a rough group.  As they lost their other games, 0-41 to Italy, 0-39 to Latvia, and 1-30 to Croatia.

The Chair of the Bulgarian Hockey Federation Dobromir Krustev called the display by Slovakia as an insulting mockery, and not at all sportsmanlike.

The head coach for Slovakia commented that they took the game as training.

Fourteen years ago, the Slovakian men's hockey team defeated the Bulgarians in their most lopsided game, 20-0.  Only a mere 62 goals less than their female counterparts.