Wrestling: 10 Worst Finishers of All The Times

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In the history of Professional Wrestling there have been some totally awesome finishing moves. Like the Canadian destroyer, the Diamond Cutter, The Stone Cold Stunner, etc. But what about those finishing moves that make us all scratch our collective heads thinking: "What in the name of Socko was that?" How could these moves make a grown man lay on the mat thinking "This hurt so bad....I....I can't get up for at least four seconds" Lets look at who I think are the 10 worst finishers ever. Keep an open mind as I will probably miss a few but its cool, I'm sure you all will remind me of some of the other disgusting finishing moves. If you disagree with this list, I apologize. Just my humble opinion. Enjoy, yea?

Honorable Mentions: MVP- Playmaker

This looks like more pain should be felt in MVP's knee than the opponents head. Maybe he just likes holding their hands. What a sweetheart.

Honorable Mention: Santino Marella- Cobra

By popular demand, here is the Cobra by Santino Marella. Its a funny move but it's also really stupid. Its like a chest poke that takes a long time. It probably tickles more than anything else...

Honorable Mention: Jerry Lawler- Fist Drop

Oh man! A punch from the top rope! The ingenuity! The Risk! 

Honorable Mention: Booker T- Scissor Kick

It's like a running Fame-Ass-er. That must have been one serious kick to the midsection. The opponent has to bend over waiting for Booker to run to the rope, bounce off, run back and thigh them in the head. Here's an idea. Stand up. 

Honorable Mention: Road Dogg- Pump Handle Slam

It pains me to put this on the list because I am a huge Road Dogg fan but this isn't good. Oh you didn't know...

Number 10: Vladimir Koslov- Battering Ram/Headbutt

If you are like me, when you watched this video and Festus started running for the ropes you yelled "Festus! NOOOOO!!!" or not.....

This is just a headbutt to the chest. How unimaginative is that? Stupid Koslov.

Number 9: Chris Master- Master Lock

Look man, this is just a full nelson. And if he applies it to someone who is considerably smaller, he swings them about like a child. Why do people fall asleep when this is applied? 

Number 8: Tito Santana- Flying Forearm Smash

My apologies, I could not find a video of this move. So instead, here is his very racist titantron video! Hooray!

He just runs, jumps and hits his opponent with his forearm. Neat. All that work for nothing.. well not nothing, this move dazzles your opponent to where they just lay there thinking of how awesome that move was.

Number 7: Umaga- Samoan Spike

I almost didn't put this on here...but then I did...

A thumb to the neck or shoulder or whatever. What's he got taped in that thumb? A shiv?

Number 6: Great Khali- Vice Grip/Brain Chop

A karate chop to the head.....ow? He then squeezes their head until they....they pass out? Why do they pass out when he squeezes their head? I guess the oxygen is being cut off to the.....or maybe they took some tylenol pm with some rum before they came out to the ring. It's possible. Jeff Hardy does that before a PPV match. Zing!

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Number 5: Scotty 2 Hotty- The Worm

That sure is a lot of work and not a lot pays off. Sure you win the match (you do?) but who really wins in the end? Hmm...

Number 4: Ultimate Warrior- Warrior Splash

The dreaded Warrior Splash. He runs and jumps high into the air (and by "high" I mean like four feet) and lands safely on his opponent. That must have knocked some wind out of him right? Right?

Number 3: Mick Foley- Mandible Claw

First, he pulls a sock out out from "parts unknown", then he puts it on his hand before finally putting it in his opponents mouth. The opponent is helpless! He can't kick, he can't punch, he is defenseless. All he can do is pass out from either the smell... or the thought. 

Number 2: John Cena- Attitude Adjustment/FU

Sure, I hate Cena as much as the next guy. But that's not why he is number 2. (Not entirely at least) 

This devastating maneuver is a Fireman's carry into a power slam. I just don't understand how falling on your back could put you down for the three count. Wrestlers fall on their backs dozens of time per match. What's so devastating about this move? Does flipping upside down disorient them? Are they awe struck by Cena's presence? I don't have these answers.Maybe we'll never know....

Number 1: Hulk Hogan- Leg Drop

He runs, he jumps and connects his thigh on their...chest.... That must be painful!

Finga Poke O Doom

Here's a video of the finger poke of doom. No finisher represents the fall of TNA...err.... I mean WCW quite like this. And it only got used once! 

 

Well, that's all I got......bye bye