Steve Frith managed to land an interview with Bill Belichick. Here's what Bill had to say about the draft...
SF: Hi Bill, and thanks for making time to see me.
BB: Who the hell are you and what are you doing in my living room!?!?
SF: Never mind that-let’s get on with the interview. Have you lost your freaking mind Bill!?! You fired the entire team and staff! What the hell were you thinking!?!
BB: Well, let me explain, you see I thi-
BB: What? Did you just call me a moron?
SF: No, of course not. Back to the interview. What were you thinking when you opted to plan on drafting actors and make believe characters?
BB: Well, I thin-
BB: There! You said it again!
SF: No I didn’t. Answer the question please.
BB: Right. There is a method to my madness in my drafting choices. I’ve just yet to figure it out.
BB: Hey! Stop calling me a moron!
SF: I’m not, you’re just paranoid. The only pick people seem to agree with is Chuck Norris. How do you feel about that?
BB: Well, I thin…..I think……………thanks for not calling me a moron.
SF: Sure thing.
BB: Any ways, I thin-
SF: I said “go on” Bill.
BB: Right, what I was thinking was that with such an outrageous team, no one will know what to do against us, and no one will be able to stop us.
SF: You do realize that half of these characters are made up and really don’t exist, don’t you?
BB: What! Why didn’t any one tell me!
SF: Maybe because you fired your staff. You remember your staff, right? The people that would’ve kept you from doing such a stupid thing Bill? Moron.
BB: Ohhhhh, that’s right, I probably should-hey, did you call me a moron again?
BB: I’ll have to get my PR guy on this ASAP.
SF: You’re PR guy is Darth Vader-a fictional character from a series of movies.
BB: Yep, and do you remember how he choked and killed that one guy? No one will ever give Darth any problems.
SF: And you’ve got Chuck Norris as the entire special teams…don’t you think that he just might not enter the NFL draft?
BB: He’ll be there, you just watch. Remember when he showed up in the movie Dodgeball out of no where? He’ll be at the draft, you wait and see.
SF: You said that you’re going to go 38-0, yet you’ll only play 19 games if you make it to the Super Bowl.
BB: We’ll win every game twice. We won nearly every game once last season, so I figure with this team we can win every game twice. It’ll be all to easy, like taking candy from a BB. Get it! I made a funny!
BB: I know…I mean HEY! Stop doing that!
SF: I think we’re done here Bill.
BB: Right, thanks for the interview.SF: Sure thing…..moron.