Did Brett Favre Break The Madden Curse?

Sean StancillSenior Writer IApril 26, 2008

During an interview with David Letterman, Brett Favre dropped the bombshell that he would be unveiled as the cover superstar on Madden 09.

Brett Favre is a retired NFL Quarterback, a Future Hall of Famer, and now a model for EA Sports Madden 09?

Who would've thought? 

After years of running backs, running quarterbacks, and wide receivers being placed on the cover, EA Sports found room for a CheeseHead. 

It's almost time for millions of people to call in sick for the week to become of the first to experience the newest version of the Madden series.

"I'm sorry, boss, I can't go to work today. I think I caught something." 

"What did you catch?"

"An 84-yard bomb from Peyton Manning to Marvin Harrison."

Well, if you're going to camp out for 3 1/2 days, you might as well get the matching game guide too.

To the inexperienced Madden Players or those of you who now find it appealing because Brett Favre is gracing the cover (CheeseHeads), here are of some of the features of the Madden Series.

 

The Hitstick

By moving the right analog stick an a up or down motion, your defensive player will react by pulverizing the ball carrier with a heart-stopping clothesline or a lethal chop block.

It's the best Madden addition ever. Having a hard day at school or just failed a major history exam? Got laid off? The Old Ball and Chain nagging at you? Well, just fling the right analog stick at a defenseless kicker and all that pain goes away.

Just think if Ray Lewis, Mike Singletary, Ed Reed, and L.T. got together to unleash their creative vision into one simple movement, what would happen? My friends, that is the Madden Hitstick.

Playmaker

This is a revolutionary device that allows the player to flip his original designed play to the opposite direction at the line of scrimmage.

Good initiative here. Playmaker definitely works well against those accursed screen watchers out there.

Just think of how you can stick it to your screen watching, play stealing little cousin who picks a weakside blitz. Just simply move the analog stick to opposite way and its smooth sailing from there.

Quarterback Vision

This tool allows you to move the right analog stick around after the play is snapped to create the illusion that you are the quarterback's eyes. Depending on what quarterback you are, you will have the eyes of a Bald Eagle or the eyes of chicken with its head cut off.

This is about the suckiest idea ever. How can you be the 49ers and create an epic comeback against the Patriots when Tom Brady can see the whole field and Alex Smith is left with 10/10 vision.

Here are the victims of the Madden Curse:

Daunte Culpepper, Michael Vick, Marshall Faulk, Shaun Alexander, Ray Lewis, Donovan McNabb, and Vince Young.

The Madden Series has become a global phenomenon and has inspired many couch potatoes to become professional gamers. Even ESPN is willing to toss out $100,000 if you can prove you're the best player in the country.

By the way, I'm pretty damn good with the San Diego Chargers.

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