Top 10 Worst NBA Team Names
By (Contributor) on June 12, 2009
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As the NBA draft gets even closer something just popped out of nowhere in my head. There are some terrible team nicknames in the NBA. So I compiled a list of the top 10 worst NBA team names which is based off a few things: 1) If it doesn't relate to the city. 2) If it doesn't sounds manly enough. 3) If it sounds like a two year old came up with it.
(PS: If you are offended by the position your favorite team may have been put in, keep in mind it's one man's opinion. I'm not saying it's the right order, your list could be different.)
10. Denver Nuggets
When I was a little kid, I always thought of McDonald's McNuggets when I heard that Denver was playing. I also thought how stupid it was. Denver gets a point for being original and for sticking with something that relates to their city, but they could have easily come up with a better name than, "Nuggets."
9. New Orleans Hornets
I do realize the Hornets were originally from Charlotte, and there probably are hornets in the NOLA area. However, the matter of the fact is that the hornets doesn’t truly or significantly relate to New Orleans. The name is a little bit childish and reminds me of a youth soccer team name. Also, I’m so irritated by all of the overused puns like “Hornets sting the Mavericks” or “Thunder beat in the Hornet’s nest”, I’m just tired of them. They aren’t clever anymore.
8. Phoenix Suns
I’m not a huge fan of team names that relate to nature or weather, and the Suns are no exception. When I think of the Phoenix Suns, I just don’t feel any intimidation from the sound of their franchise. The Suns would be better fitted as a WNBA team, or like the Hornets, a youth soccer team. The old logos looked very youthful, not now though since their change. It's still a bad choice.
7. Charlotte Bobcats
Now I believe this was a name that was voted on the by the city, but that doesn't excuse how very unoriginal it is. It's a shame that they had to pick a name that also is shared with about every other elementary and high school in the United States. Just to point this out, is it just me or do the jerseys look like they were designed on Microsoft word? It looks like WordArt, just saying.
6. Los Angeles Lakers
Are there any lakes in Los Angeles, or at least that people care about? The closest thing I can think of is Hugh Hefner’s pool. The Lakers have made up for this bad name with championships, but still Los Angeles could have easily changed the name when the team was moved from Minneapolis. It’s LA for crying out loud.
5. Los Angeles Clippers
Staying in the same vicinity, the Clippers just doesn't sound right. Most people wouldn't realize that a Clipper is a boat, and they would assume they are referring to something that cuts stuff. The main reason it dropped so low is because it isn't threatening. The logo isn't too appealing, and the team just doesn't live up to the hype of Los Angeles.
4. Oklahoma City Thunder
One of my biggest pet peeves are teams named after nature. The Thunder get right under my skin. The Thunder has nothing to do with the OKC, it’d make just as much sense to call them the Hurricanes. OKC isn’t known for Thunder, it would be wind and tornadoes, which would have been equally bad names, but still they’d be more fitting for the OKC. The only way the could improve the Thunder gimmick is by getting some bad-ass logo, which they didn’t. So this was a fail on Clay Bennett’s part of not letting the fans choose.
3. Utah Jazz
I will cut them some slack by putting them at number three, nonetheless this is a terrible name for Salt Lake City’s basketball team. Jazz was a good fit for New Orleans because of all the Jazz clubs, and what not. However, when you moved the team to one of the whitest cities in America, you really need to change the name. This one just doesn’t make sense.
2. Washington Wizards
I hate the league for making Washington get rid of the “Bullets”, perhaps one of the best names in basketball. The Wizards? This is by far one of the nerdiest and most lame names you can think of. I’ll refer back to one of my earlier picks, and say this is better fitted for a youth soccer team or maybe an all gay water polo team. This atrocity may be even worse than the Washington Nationals. It’s that bad.
1. New Jersey Nets
Well, with a name like this you might as well call them the backboards or headbands or Benchwarmers. The Nets isn't original or creative, it is the most dull and least exciting name that you can come up with. I mean how can you not think of something more clever than basketball equipment. If they were to use a name that didn't relate to their area, that would be just fine. Their attempt at alliteration just failed.
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