Somebody order the Cubs a crate of four-leaf clovers, and deliver immediately to right-hander Randy Wells. You better act fast, because if we don't give him something to hang hope on, he might tell Carlos Zambrano that the new drink dispenser in the dugout is actually Kevin Gregg.
In his fifth start of the season against the Braves, Wells pitched magnificently through seven innings, allowing one run on two hits.
He had been flirting with a no-hitter through six-and-two-thirds, and the only thing keeping him away from a journey toward a perfect game was a hit batter that, thanks to the magic of replay and sound, actually hit the barrel of Yunel Escobar's bat.
Then, the wheels nearly came off in the eighth. After giving up a lead-off home run and Derek Lee's error, Wells gave way to Carlos Marmol, who promptly gave up two runs.
Heading into the bottom of the ninth with a 5-3 lead, the Cubs turned to their closer Gregg.
Let's stop right there and rewind to May 16 against the Astros.
Randy Wells had pitched six innings, giving up four hits and no runs. The Cubs entered the bottom of the ninth, and Kevin Gregg entered the 4-0 game, a non-save situation.
Before Wells could pop the bubbly on his first major-league victory, Gregg gave up the lead, and the Cubs gave Gregg a very undeserved win off a walk-off RBI single from Alfonso Soriano.
Now we return to Tuesday night's contest.
Gregg got a long fly-ball out on Brian McCann. Then, Garret Anderson reached on a dropped third strike, giving Jeff Francoeur a chance to tie the game with one swing.
Gregg gladly gave him a chance to be the hero with a fat fastball which was crushed to straight-away center field.
Randy Wells was robbed of yet another victory. One look at his game log, and you can't believe his luck.
In his first start, Wells gave up only two runs through seven innings, and the Cubs lost 2-1.
Next time around, Wells gave up three runs through seven more innings. Cubs lost 3-1.
His start after the aforementioned Houston game, Wells pitched only five innings, but gave up no runs. The Cubs blew his chance at a win yet again, losing 3-2.
Now, Wells watched his near-no-hitter turn into a 6-5 loss in 12 innings in Atlanta.
It looks like the only way Randy Wells will ever get his first victory is if Lou Piniella allows Wells to pitch nine innings.
One thing is for sure, Randy Wells will be contemplating slipping a mickey into Kevin Gregg's drink the next time he starts.
On the other hand, perhaps he should put it in Jim Hendry's.