Biggest World Football Blunders of the Weekend: Rush Goalie Special

Greg Johnson@gregianjohnsonSpecial to Bleacher ReportNovember 4, 2013

Biggest World Football Blunders of the Weekend: Rush Goalie Special

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    Charlie Crowhurst/Getty Images

    The rules of the mythical Keepers Union dictates that all goalkeepers stick together when it comes to comments in the press, but it seems that some shot stoppers have taken the idea of solidarity a step too far this weekend.

    Joe Hart left his defence in no-man's land last week with a blooper that gifted Fernando Torres and Chelsea a winning goal, yet judging by some of the recent attempts to deter strikers from across the globe, the Englishman is far from alone when it comes to making reckless and costly mishaps.

    Some of the examples in this slideshow will lead you to question whether the offending players were on a mission to cover up Hart's embarrassment by trying to top the Manchester City custodian's midsummer themselves.

    Unfortunately for their teams, a few even succeeded.

    Elsewhere in this week's list you'll find violence in the Northern League, a fiery atmosphere in Belgrade and more bad misses from the English Premier League and Brazilian Serie A.

    If you missed last week's batch of blunders, featuring Hart against Chelsea and Jurgen Klopp versus the fourth official, click here.

    Otherwise, hit the button below or click on the arrows above in order to start running through the slides.

Hart-Less Yet Still Hopeless: Kiev's Veteran Keeper Midjudges Bounce

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    Dynamo Kiev's Oleksandr Shovkovskiy is one of the most experienced goalkeepers in Europe, boasting over 100 Champions League appearances, a 2011 award for being the Europa League's best keeper and a mention in the long list for the 1999 Ballon d'Or prize. Not too shabby at all.

    However, even the Ukrainian's impressive record of achievement couldn't prevent the 38-year-old from being beaten by a stray long ball that bounced awkwardly ahead of the veteran goalie.

    Rooted to the spot, Shovkovskiy could only watch on in horror as the ball arched over him to bound away into the path of Zorya's onrushing striker who dispatched it into the back of the net.

    They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but in the cases of Shovkovskiv and Hart, both keepers appear to aiming instead for the absurd.

Hart-Less Yet Still Hopeless: Alumina's Facial Deflection

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    Football fans will have grown used to hearing certain players compared to video games of late, with both Lionel Messi and David Luiz having been described as Playstation footballers in the recent past, albeit in very different respective meanings.

    Watford goalkeeper and former Arsenal man Almunia became another player who shares a likeness with the virtual worlds of FIFA and Pro Evolution Soccer at the weekend, with his awful deflected goal kick that ended up in his own net.

    As many gamers will know, a poor and lazy attempt to boot the ball from your own box can be one of the easiest ways to hand your opponents a free goal, which also seems to be the case when it comes to reality too.

    Leicester City striker Chris Wood was the lucky, if slightly dazed benefactor, of Almunia's sloppy attempt to kick the ball back into play, feeling the full force of the delivery as it collided with his face before pinging directly into the goal.

    Watford would lose the game 3-0 after Almunia gifted Leicester their opener. Poor show.

Hart-Less Yet Still Hopeless: Ochieng Misses the Ball Completely

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    "It's a mess", so says the commentator in the clip above as Allan Wanga's fires home the opening goal of AFC Leopards' win over Sofapaka in the Kenyan GOtv Shield Cup semifinal at the weekend.

    Dancan Ochieng continued the theme of hapless goalkeepers rushing off their lines to meet calamity, as he surged out of his box to kick away danger only to miss the ball completely and swing his foot into mid-air.

    Moments later, Wanga had his goal and the AFC Leopards were well on their way to securing passage to the Shield Cup final.

Hart-Less Yet Still Hopeless: Slovakia U-17 Keeper Imitate England's No. 1

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    Another unfortunate opener brought about by a goalkeeping error, this time at U17 World Cup.

    Uruguay beat Slovakia 4-2 in the end but got off to a great start when Leandro Otormin took advantage of Martin Junas' misjudged attempt to take care of a bouncing long ball.

    While the young keeper's error is directly compared to Hart's own mistake against Chelsea in the commentary to the video above, Junas' mistake looks more similar to those made by Freiburg's Oliver Baumann last weekend, as featured in the previous rundown of world football bloopers.

It's a Trapp! Czech Striker Tries to Distract Keeper

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    Veria FC's Petr Trapp attempted to get one over on opposition keeper Markos Vellidis in their Greek Super League match against PAS Giannina at the weekend.

    His lame attempts at distraction came to nought however, with the Vellidis' blocked view neither helping nor hindering the keeper due to the poor shot delivery that flew off course.

    PAS Giannina eventually won the game 2-0.

Can You Smell Burning? Red Star Take on Partizan

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    Matches between Red Star Belgrade and Partizan are known as the Eternal Derby and are always affairs.

    Burning down a stadium may lead to a dramatic shortening of the time span associated with this fierce rivalry however, and with bonfires appearing in the stands, it wouldn't have taken much for disaster to strike and the terrible potential of the ultras' actions to become all too evident.

    Passion is one thing, but this has got blunder written all over it.

Red Star's Mid-Week Corner Could Be the Worst Ever

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    It wasn't just Red Star's fans who made it onto the blooper reel this week, with Nenad Milijas providing another slide's worth of failure from a midweek game against Radnicki Kragujevac.

    Having opened the scoring from the penalty spot, the former Wolverhampton Wanderers midfielder eventually found himself presented with a corner to take later in the game.

    Unfortunately, Milijas appeared to forget how to play football at the precise moment he needed to summon up a delivery into the box, leading to a comically pathetic piddle of a pass being sent the wrong side of the corner flag.

    Red Star's manager Slavia Stojanovic was understandably uncharitable in his reaction. Thankfully, his team still ran out 3-0, with or without a competent corner taker.

Non-League Referee Misses Cowardly, Jaw Breaking Right Hook

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    Our next clip comes from a Northern League match between Heaton Stannington and Birtley, where the visitors' Mark Brereton somehow got away with breaking his opponent's jaw before being subbed off before the referee and his assistants could react.

    If the sound recorded on the video is anything to go by, they must have heard the hit even if they didn't see it connect.

    Thankfully, some kind of justice was served as Heaton ran out 3-0 winners.

Fabrizio Ravanelli Falls for His Own Player's False Injury Ploy

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    It's hard to tell if former Middlesbrough legend Fabrizio Ravanelli was trying to send a message to his player here or whether he was genuinely bought in by his play acting.

    Now coach of Ligue 1 side Ajaccio, the Italian made a substitution after his Ivorian striker Gadji Tallo was taken off the field after going to the ground in the pain.

    The forward wasn't expecting his manager to be so decisive with his subs bench however, and after realising he'd been taken off, leapt to his feet to remonstrate from across the field.

    He then made his way to the dugout to further argue with Ravanelli, making it all too obvious that his injury had been completely fabricated.


Big Miss in Brazilian Youth Game

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    The U20 Copa do Brasil 2014 saw a shocking miss from one of Santos' latest striker prospects Neilton, who left an empty net gaping as his side lost to Atletico Mineiro 2-0.

    Oh what could have been Neilton!

Essien Concedes Throw-in from Wild Shot on Goal

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    There was once a time where the idea of Michael Essien's foot connecting with a shot on the outskirts of a keeper's box would inspired nightmare of paralysing terror.

    Fortunately for Arsenal, those days have long since past, and while Chelsea may have beaten the Gunners 2-0 in the Capital One Cup during the week, Essien at least provided a brief moment of comic relief for the spectators.

    His shot was so bad that it ended up turning around to curve off towards the other end of the field for a throw-in.

    Daddy will not have been happy.