Life and Sports: They don't always pan out the way you think they will.
One day you're betting the mortgage on Kentucky basketball to take home the national championship, four months later they've been knocked out of the NIT and you're sleeping in the pit again. Or perhaps you bet big money that Maryland would beat FSU football, and now you eat shoelaces and cook hobo chili under the expressway.
We can't all be right all the time. Sometimes you're right, sometimes you're a moron.
That being said, most of us can be better than these sports predictions. They might've sounded good at the moment, but the following are some of the "guaranteed locks" and hot sports takes that missed the mark by a mile or five.
These are sports predictions that went hysterically wrong, along with my smug reactions born of superior hindsight. These takes aren't pretty, but they'll remind you to always take your expert opinions with a heavy rim of salt.
The Culprit: Skip Bayless
The Prediction: Skipper predicted the Patriots would go 15-1 and win the 2013 Super Bowl, barring one loss to "Tebow." He also laughed at Stephen A. Smith for predicting the Ravens would make it to the Super Bowl.
Actuality: The Ravens made the postseason, beat the Patriots at Gillette Stadium and defeated the 49ers to win the Super Bowl.
GIF via MRwGifs.com
The Culprit: UF fans.
The Prediction: Gator fans took out two full page ads in the Georgia student paper predicting No. 2 Florida would beat No. 10 Georgia by "at least 3 TD's" in their 2012 matchup at EverBank Field. The ads also mocked Bulldogs head coach Mark Richt and cited Georgia's suspect defense and poor record against ranked opponents.
Actuality: Georgia's defense stifled the Gators and the Bulldogs won 17-9.
Reaction: Walked into that one, Gator fans.
Image via thelolgifs.tumblr.com
The Culprit: Chicago Bears wide receiver Brandon Marshall.
The Prediction: Speaking to media after a practice in 2012, the newly-minted Chicago Bears wideout predicted the team would make an appearance at the 2013 Super Bowl.
Actuality: The Bears started the 2012 season red hot, but fell apart in historic fashion. They became the second team since the NFL expanded to a 12-team postseason to start a season 7-1 and miss the playoffs .
Image via GifSoup.com
The Culprit: Media, Pele and US soccer fans.
The Prediction: Everyone believed that Freddy Adu, a 14-year-old soccer prodigy, would be the next megastar of the sport. The hype over the young Ghanaian-born teenager reached a fever pitch in the early 2000's, and ads like this Sierra Mist spot showing Adu with Pele only furthered expectations.
Actuality: A decade or so has passed since Adu Fever struck US soccer fans, and Freddy hasn't lived up to expectations. After struggling abroad and failing to spark lasting magic with the US men's national team, Adu now plays for Bahia—a small market squad in Brazil.
Reaction: We placed the the future of our nation's soccer team on the shoulders of kid who was barely a teenager. Granted, it wasn't the dumbest thing we fell for in the early 2000's.
Image via seanssabbatical.com
The Culprit: Sports Illustrated.
The Prediction: In a bid to drum up publicity, SI metaphorically threw a dollar on a horse with 30-1 odds and conjectured that the Cubs could/would win the 2004 World Series.
Actuality: The Cubs did not win the 2004 World Series.
Reaction: Stop hitting yourself, SI.
GIF via Redditor @AlwaysGoingHome
The Culprit: Cleveland Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert.
The Prediction: In an open letter following LeBron James' departure from Cleveland, Gilbert personally guaranteed his fan base that the Cavs would "win an NBA championship before the self-titled former 'king' wins one."
Actuality: LeBron James has won two NBA championships since leaving Cleveland, thus bringing his official tally to two, over Cleveland's zero.
Reaction: Super facepalm.
Image via reactionface.info
The Culprit: Some dadgum computer simulation thingy conjured up by EA Sports.
The Prediction: In an EA Sports simulated forecast, the computer predicted that the Seahawks would lose to the 49ers in Week 2 of the 2013 season. And with that loss, Wilson would have to shave his eyebrow, as per a pregame bet he made with Colin Kaepernick.
Actuality: The Seahawks trampled the 49ers 29-3 at CenturyLink Field, and Colin Kaepernick ended up being the one "shaving" his eyebrow.
Reaction: Disappointment. Not because the 49ers lost, but because the eyebrow bet was a sham.
The Culprit: Mel Kiper.
The Prediction: Kiper insisted that Jimmy Clausen was the fourth best player in the 2010 NFL draft, and would go in the first round.
Actuality: Clausen was selected in the second round by the Carolina Panthers. Still a believer, Kiper maintained that the Notre Dame quarterback's considerable talent would be revealed in three years time. Clausen ended up starting 10 games his rookie season, winning only two. The Panthers would bring in Cam Newton in 2011 and Clausen ended up on the bench. He was released by the Panthers this August and is currently a free agent.
Reaction: Keep on trolling, Mel.
The Culprit: Sports Illustrated columnist Paul Zimmerman.
The Prediction: "Dr. Z" predicted the Buffalo Bills would win the Super Bowl in 1991, 1992 and 1993.
Actuality: The Bills lost all three Super Bowls, the final being a 52-17 drubbing at the hands of the Dallas Cowboys.
Reaction: STOP CURSING THE BILLS, DR. Z.
GIF via GifSoup.com
The Culprit: Steelers defensive back Anthony Smith.
The Prediction: Coming into a late-season 2007 game against an undefeated Patriots team, Steelers footnote/safety Anthony Smith told the media he guaranteed the Steelers would beat Tom Brady.
The Reality: The Patriots steamrolled the Steelers 34-13, and Tom Brady personally chewed out Smith.
Image via QuickMeme.com
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