Time To Take Out the Trash: Debunking the Baltimore Ravens' Top Five Myths

Andrew RoutCorrespondent IApril 8, 2009

Note from the author:  If your skin is of the thin variety, this is not for you!

After spending countless hours pondering the thoughts of the talking heads on the television screen and die hard Ravens fans, I have noticed that there are several myths prevailing amongst some of our purple brethren.

Let's examine these myths, and give them the proper burial that they deserve. Consider this a public service!


Myth No. 1

Life after Ray Lewis

Many believe that L.a.R.L. is the football god's equivalent of damnation, sending our defense to the greatest depths of hell previously only resided by the lowest of the lower life forms (Detroit Lions, Cincinnati Bengals, Cleveland Browns, Pacman Jones, etc.).

Boys and girls, THIS IS A LIE.

In a sport where an individual's success is so heavily reliant upon the talent supporting him, I propose to you that our defense made Ray Lewis the legend that he is, not the other way around.

As we all know, Baltimore has always had an embarrassment of riches on the defensive side of the ball, and Ray has benefited immensely from the presence of the other greats. Hence, Ray's public campaign to recruit guys like Haloti Ngata. Ray knows who butters his bread.

Myth No. 2

We don't need X wide receiver, we are a run-first team!

Well, duh! Maybe we're a running team because our receivers suck?? And not for a lack of trying, we've already burned a couple first round picks on WR over the past few years.

Make no mistake about it, if you can't run the ball, you're not going to win many games. But in order to bring that trophy home, a balanced offense is need.

You HAVE to be able to make plays through the air consistently as well. That doesn't mean that you need a top 10 passing attack, it merely means that you need to be able to make plays though the air when needed.

Yes, we DO need X wide receiver!!

Myth No. 3

Mark Clayton is an emerging deep threat.

I guess technically, this is true, due to the word "emerging". What a great word that is! It allows one to apply any arbitrary amount of time necessary to substantiate your pathetic debate.

"True, Clayton hasn't done anything in his four years in the league, but he is still emerging!" Do you see the silliness in that statement? No? Then nevermind, you're hopeless and I'm wasting my valuable time on you peasants.


Myth No. 4

This was Rex Ryan's defense, and now that he's gone, we're $@&*#*!

Seriously, how many times are we going to have to go through this song and dance? Didn't we proclaim these sentiments after Mike Nolan, Marvin Lewis and Jack Del Rio each left? The "system" is developed by the premier talent on the field, not by the guys wearing too-tight T-shirts and a scowl on the sidelines.


Myth No. 5

"Ozzie is god, yo!" "Ozzie is soo kewl!" "Ozzie is da man!

Actually, not quite sure how this got on my list, because it is all true. Never question the wizardary of Oz.

There are several more newer myths developing, but they are so asinine that even the majority of the mouthbreathers attempting to read this article can recognize them for what they are, so I shall not waste any more of my precious knowledge on the unwashed masses.

To the rest of us in the know, just smile and nod next time one of these gems are brought up at the tailgate party.