NFL: Missouri, Home of the Mustache

With the impending hire of Jeff Fisher as the St. Louis Rams head coach, Missouri has become the official home of the mustache in the National Football League. Nobody rocks the 'stache better than Fisher and his Show Me State coaching colleague Romeo Crennel of the Kansas City Chiefs.

Who’s the better coach? Who cares? The real question is which front man’s hairy mark of masculinity is superior.

2. Romeo Crennel

Career Record: 26-41

Mustache Type: Cuddly Overlord

Crennel’s neatly-trimmed graying mustache lends to him the qualities of your favorite teddy bear. In a way he resembles former Soviet Union dictator Joseph Stalin, who helped win World War II, but never beat the Green Bay Packers.

1. Jeff Fisher

Career Record: 147-126 (Including playoffs)

Mustache Type: Classic Cop/Porn Star

The newest Ram looks like a 1970’s rogue police detective who moonlights as an adult film star. Armed with a 'stache that’s bushier and less gray than Crennel’s, as well as wrap-around sunglasses, Fisher projects a toughness you’d expect from a former USC and Chicago Bears defensive back.

Chuck Norris wouldn’t mess with this mustache.