Patriots News: Bill Belichick To Launch Clothing Line

You've seen him wear it at almost every Patriots game. You know you've always wanted one for yourself.  And now you'll finally get a chance to have your very own, authentic, Bill Belichick sweatshirt—complete with the signature cut-off sleeves.

In an agreement reached today with Fruit of the Loom, Belichick brought NFL fans closer to his armpits than ever before. 

"The NFL apparel market in the United States is a $100 million a year business and we feel that many fans of the Bill Belichick look have been ignored for too long," Fruit of the Loom spokesperson Amy Wangle said. 

"Fans of Mr. Belichick love his ‘I give up’ image," Wangle added.  "We've all wanted to get up to go to work and simply say ‘Screw it, I'm wearing my PJ's today.’  Well Mr. Belichick gets to wear his PJ's to work every day, why shouldn't the average American." 

It turns out however, that Fruit of the Loom has a huge inventory of unsold sweatshirts lying around. 

"All we had to do was cut off the sleeves and then sell them at a premium," an anonymous Fruit of the Loom employee stated.  "You don't have to be a genius to know that that makes good business sense.  Just between you and I though, if Mr. Belichick had decided not to sign on, we were going to go with our 'Be a Bum' campaign instead."

Plans of the clothing line have yet to be completely disclosed to the public, but this inside reporter has discovered that the sweatshirts will come in three colors—grey, light grey, and dark grey—and will be sold individually or as a package with matching cutoff sweatpants. 

The sweatshirts will be available with team logos for all 32 NFL teams, but if you really want to feel what it's like to be the most boring coach in the NFL, the Patriot's model is recommended by Fruit of the Loom.

Belichick was unavailable to comment on the recent announcement, but had we been able to reach him, I'm sure that his response would have been very monotone and uninteresting—just like his clothing line will be.