Boston Red Sox: What Celebrity Would They Be?

The Boston Red Sox have been making minor moves over the past couple of days in signing Nick Punto, Kelly Shoppach and acquiring Mark Melancon from the Houston Astros.  While many of us realize that they are not finished yet as I detailed in a previous article, right now all we can do is wait and see what moves will be made.

At the moment it appears to be a slow news day on the Red Sox front, so I've decided to have a little fun with the local nine. My wife is all about pop culture. I am not.  However, I thought to myself, what pop culture star would most align with members of the Boston Red Sox?

For the purpose of this article, I decided to look at a few selections from the Boston Red Sox and try to align them with Pop Culture stars. I figure it could be a musician, politician or actor, so long as I could offer some type of solid reasoning as to why.

Having said that, here is my list:

Josh Beckett

Josh Beckett is a  veteran star who's got his fair share of awards under his belt.  He won the 2003 NL Babe Ruth Award, 2003 ML WS MVP and the 2007 AL ALCS MVP.  Recently he has had his work ethic called into question and has even had his weight called into question as well.

Beckett's attitude has always been part of his endearing nature as well. In Boston, it just wouldn't be a post game interview if he didn't manage to slip in an F-Bomb somewhere.  Beckett has always been considered very good at what he does, while sometimes even brilliant.

However, when out of the spotlight he has managed to do some stupid things, such as partake in beer and chicken and pack on some weight during the season.

He has not however, been in the paper for refusing to turn off his Ipad, like his celebrity counterpart.  When I think of Josh Beckett, I think of none other than Alec Baldwin.  Very good at what he does, but when not in the limelight he will do things that just make you scratch your head.

Jacoby Ellsbury

Jacoby Ellsbury is the young hot talent on the team.  He has it all but hasn't made the big bucks yet.  While coming up he showed flashes of brilliance and then was sidelined with injury.  His toughness was called into question.  Then, he came roaring back with a monster season in 2011, coming in second for the AL MVP award.

While the Red Sox have tried to extend Ellsbury's contract they have been unsuccessful.  This brings into question his loyalty to the team.  Odds are he will go where the money is the most at the end of his current contract, and his sky is the limit.

Okay, it was a little bit harder to come up with the equivalent of this in the real world, so I took it a step further into one of my favorite movies.  In 2006's Rocky Balboa, Antonio Tarver plays heavyweight boxing champion Mason "The Line" Dixon.  Once he had made it big he left his original trainer, Martin (played by Henry G. Sanders) for the promise of more money with new, flashier promoters.

It's a stretch, I know, but in the film Dixon had all the promise in the world and went for the money and the fame.

Adrian Gonzalez

Adrian Gonzalez has superstar qualities, a great record behind him and such a bright future, but he has not taken the spotlight over yet in Boston.  He is playing "best supporting actor" right now.

Sure, he has impressive numbers, but he has yet to take the reigns of the ship and lead us into victory.  We sit back in awe of his performances, yet he hasn't been cast as Mr. Clutch yet.

He reminds me of Heath Ledger in 2008 for his role as the Joker in The Dark Knight.  Ledger won best supporting actor that year and he was outstanding as the Joker, but Ledger had never won anything as a leading man.

Gonzalez has all the time in the world now (and the contract to boot) to step up and become the next Mickey Rourke!  (Um, if you're following along, Rourke won Best Actor in 2008 for his role in The Wrestler.)

It is his time to shine.

David Ortiz

David Ortiz is a legend in town, plain and simple.  What he has done for Boston baseball is immeasurable.  His smile is infectious, his resume is pristine.  The problem is, he has passed his time and the downturn could be upon us immediately.

There is no certain way of knowing. While he has been solid for the past few years, the year in front of us could be terrible.

He could be Adam Sandler.  While Sandler had immense success early in his career with Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore and The Wedding Singer to name a few, he just blessed us with an abysmal film entitled Jack & Jill.  This makes us pine for days when Sandler was a good actor.

That could be in store for Ortiz. Or, he could be the next Ray Allen.  Allen, the star guard for the Boston Celtics appears to be ageless and is consistently good, but not able to rise to the level of superstardom he once showed in his early days in the NBA.

I think it is a coin toss.

Carl Crawford

Carl Crawford has made a ton of money, is a great player, but needs to prove himself soon to be worth talking about any more.

He came to Boston on the heels of a huge contract and has left Red Sox fans feeling underwhelmed thus far.  Probably like the brass that hired Howard Stern to do XM Satelite radio... they gave him a monster deal figuring it would change the landscape of radio.

The problem is, at least in my circle, I don't think anyone I know has XM Radio, let alone got it just for Stern.

It is time for Crawford to pull his weight and earn that contract, or else Red Sox nation will be calling for just the good ole reliable FM version.

Dustin Pedroia

Dustin Pedroia is closely comparable to the human heart.

He is the heart of this team, the heart of the fan base, the heart beat of its energy.  There is no better comparison in my book.

Bobby Valentine

While Bobby Valentine has not had the opportunity to really make any solid impact on the Red Sox as of yet, it is hard to really pin him down.

The best way to look at him would be as like the President of the United States: Barack O'Bama.  Some people like him, some do not.

Either way, history will really be the one to dictate how well he does during his time in Boston.