Terrelle Pryor To Sign With Ringling Bros.
In a surprising twist of events, high school football phenom Terrelle Pryor finally made the announcement we've all been waiting for. "I'm joining the circus", Pryor told reporters at a press conference held in the Jeannette Senior High School gymnasium.
"I want to thank my family, especially my Dad, for making me take the time to think this through and not make any rash decisions. I know that there are a lot of great schools out there that were doing everything in their power to have me enroll. But ultimately my decision came down to a lifelong desire to be shot out of a cannon".
Just when we thought TP had narrowed down his choices to Michigan, Ohio State, Penn State and Oregon, a dark horse found it's way into the mix. And it seems as though Pryor's raw football talent will go to waste - or will it?
In a statement made by Ringling Bros. Ringmaster Arlington Piccadilly, shortly following the Pryor press conference, the idea of having a Ringling Bros. football team of their own seems as though it may not be so far fetched. "This is the acquisition we've been waiting for. You wouldn't believe how hard it is to attract good talent to the circus. You may not be aware, but there is a huge underground circus league, and we've been getting our butt's kicked by carni's far and wide for too long. I have to tell you, the Bearded Lady is ecstatic, as are the rest of us."
To no ones surprise, most shocked of all were the coaches who so actively recruited Pryor. Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez had this to say about today's events, "I first heard of this news last evening when I had a phone conversation with Terrelle. At the time I just assumed the kid was drunk. But apparently he's just crazy".
Whatever he is, Pryor's impact is sure to be felt by circus fans, and bearded ladies alike. Look out Zucchini Bros.—this kid can run.
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