EHAW! Fantasy Bounties Should Pay the Bills

Dan BentonCorrespondent IDecember 13, 2008

For those Cowboy fans that play fantasy football and happen to read this looking for a solution to woes headed into the week 15 fracas at the old BarB Ranch and Funhouse, Merry Christmas! Happy Hallucinations! There is no cure for the woes you have been watching in Dallas.

Those visions that you have seen of Terrell Owens running around in the end zone forming the letters of his initials really are not rites of celebration; they might be likened to the mythical wings of disaster, hovering over the field, waiting for the most opportune time to raise havoc and draw even more attention to Owens antics. After all, for a person committed to have the picture be all about them, bad attention is better than no attention.

If the Cowboys beat the Giants this weekend, then the immediate soap opera circling Romitten and the "Secret Meetings" will head underground for the time being, like a snake headed in for the cold Texas panhandle winter. The problems will not have actually been solved nor will they have gone far away.

They just aren't shaking their rattles, holding still instead before they rear their ugly head to strike again. In this scenario, when the Cowboys fall on hard times again, the team will simply begin slitting each other's throats at the first opportunity. The body count and finger pointing will be maximized again, just at a little later date than now.

If the Giants beat the "Boys, then Wade Phillips probably will be the first speed bump that the team bus rolls over, since Jerry Jones has too much dinero tied up in Owens, Romo, and Witten to start cleaning house. Actually, to this outsider, Witten and Romo appear to be unwilling dupes pulled into the Texas whirlpool that Owens creates eventually, no matter where Drew Rosenhaus has him sign his name to a contract.

Remember, by Owens' own words, "I am just all about winning!" Translated that into reality that actually reads," I am all into myself and screw everybody and everything else that does not lead to that conclusion."

Wade Phillips, the captain of this sinking ship, is not worried about his locker room being split into warring factions though. "I am not worried about a divided locker room," Phillips said. Often showing the demeanor of a true Cowboy who just stepped into a prairie cow flop he did not see, Phillips still looks bewildered and wanting to be anywhere else but where the cameras are.

Of course he is not worried about his locker room; he has to be worried about keeping his job for the rest of this season. The ringing endorsement that owner Jerry Jones stated a few weeks ago that Phillips was on safe ground, really could be translated as "I wonder if he knows how to tread the surface in quicksand?"

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