One Philadelphia Phillies Fan's New Guide For Booing

Scott Eisenlohr by Correspondent Written on December 13, 2008
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Hey, there has been a lot of trash taking between the Mets and Phillies and their fans in the past week.

Surely, when Cole Hamels pitches in the new Citi Field in New York, the new Shea Stadium, he will be booed.

Same for Jose Reyes when he comes to Philadelphia. And J.D. Drew, of the Boston Red Sox, will get showered with boos the next time he comes to Philadelphia. Same goes for Scotty Rolen, shown above, if he even plays again.

But I am here to tell you, STOP. Stop the booing. We started booing J.D. Drew and Scott Rolen for not coming or staying in Philadelphia and help us to win a championship. Curt Shilling, towel draped over his head when Mitch Williams was pitching, got traded because he thought the Phillies didn't do a good job of getting the talent to Philadelphia to win a championship.

It's over. We won a championship. Stop booing. Well, Chipper Jones, that's another story. Go ahead and boo him. But the Braves are pitiful. Boo Scott Olsen, now a pitcher with the Nationals, when he comes to town. When he was with the Marlins he said he hated the Phillies. The Nationals? Oh, that's right. They suck, too. Forget it.

But before we get the opportunity to be the town of champions, we have to change our attitude. Hey, the old 700 club during the Philadelphia Eagles football games at the old Veteran Stadium are gone. Priced right out of Lincoln Financial Field. It is said that the ghost of Santa Claus and the Dirty 30 roam the parking lot that used to be the Vet. Psych!

Oh, don't get me started on the negative. Philly fans, you know what I am talking about.

Screw the Rolans and Drews of the world. Don't boo them. Don't cheer them. Let them hear the crickets and the hot dog vendors.

'Cause they don't matter no more. Screw Curt Shilling too. Well, the only thing he does these days in Philadelphia is raise money for ALS. And that is a good thing. But he is no factor, no more. Clap for him when he raises money.

Same for Drew. He won his title in Boston. Good for him. We got Jason Werth and Shane Victorino. Now Raul Ibenez.

No need to boo, at least this year. We are the champs.

The rest of the baseball world is jealous of us and the Phils are doing the darnedest to win the thing again.

Winning brings confidence. It makes Cole Hamels admit the Mets choked and makes Chase Utley say the Phils are the World F'ing Champions.

We ain't no Philly Nation. We don't have 26 World Championships, either. Nope. We are Philly, sucker, we are loud and proud and not afraid of anyone and any words.

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written on December 13, 2008 Humor

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