When Bleacher Report asked me to write this piece, I thought, "Well, my daughters all have four legs (two dogs and a cat) and my sister married a really good friend of mine."
But hey, I have already told my wife that she is not only encouraged, but instructed to leave me for Aaron Rodgers if she gets a chance. He has such class and is so accomplished that I would consider him an upgrade for her.
Of course, the premise of this assignment is not to be taken literally. I am to find a baker's dozen players who seem perfect for those I care about, like a younger sister or daughter, without having to find ones whose personalities mesh with the actual people in my life—good thing considering how little I know them as people.
If you love them, you want them to be married to someone with character. But you also want your family taken care of.
Thus, most players on this list have a contract that places them in the top 50 in annual salary. Because I am a San Jose Sharks fan, the exceptions are all members of the team I would most want free tickets to...