Rugby World Cup 2011 Semifinals: The Stories That Won't Make the Newspapers

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Rugby World Cup 2011 Semifinals: The Stories That Won't Make the Newspapers
Sandra Mu/Getty Images

It was a weekend that was dominated by red cards, ref’s calls and running claret. Again, the weekend’s action produced many great stories. Many of these have not made today’s newspapers. Time to uncover the news that didn’t happen; believe this stuff at your own peril.

 

Wales livid with semifinal referee, Allain Rolland. Welsh supporters believe Rolland should know that Sam Warburton is a good guy and would not purposefully deploy dirty tactics. Rolland blames Probation's Department for not preparing Warburton’s file in a timely fashion, before he made his decision to show Sam a red card.

Welsh coach Warren Gatland says his team are not “whiter than white.” The Welsh may be good singers, but they’re certainly not choir boys.

Nostradamus predicts the world will end next year. Sebastian Chabal predicts French victory. What is it with the French and their predictions?

All Blacks say David Pocock is a cheat. English say Richie McCaw is a cheat. Welsh say Allan Rolland is a cheat. Samoans say the world is cheating them. Sam Warburton recently said everyone cheats. And of course, then there’s Mike Tindall?  What is it with rugby players and cheating?

Lievremont calls for help with selections this weekend. “Should I select to keep my moustache or should I shave it off?” 

 

Sandra Mu/Getty Images
Selection problems for Lievremont, should it stay or should it mo?

 

New Zealand officials have refused to issue exit visas to a number of rugby World Cup visitors. It seems that after the All Black semifinal win, the French rugby team travelled en masse with bags packed to the Auckland Airport. An airport official remarked “We advised the French, they just needed to turn up on game day and give it their alors.” The French blamed their appearance at the airport on Twitter, it was apparently a misunderstood flash mob announcement. 

New Zealand Police deny they're considering laying charges against the Irish rugby team for robbing the rugby World Cup of a decent final game.The Irish win over Australia, saw the Wallabies having to face the All Blacks in the semis and allowed France to make the finals without playing any of the TriNations teams in the knockout rounds.

Similarly the Police have dropped charges against the French squad, for impersonating a team that had made the rugby World Cup finals.

Recruitment advertisement in L’Equipe reads “Modern day Charles de Gaulle required to lead French resistance against the All Blacks. Fixed-term role. Travel required. Teamwork and communication skills advantageous but not essential.”

Security alert. All Blacks told not to board any boats, while they’re in Auckland preparing for the finals, this week. CIA suggests French sleeper cells have again set themselves in up in New Zealand.

Phil Walter/Getty Images
It's home time boys

It’s lucky the Wallabies are sponsored by Qantas, their national airline. It’s home time, boys.

 

John Key seeks George Gregan’s permission to use his famous expression with one small amendment. Instead of “Four more years, boys” he wants to paraphrase this and exclaim “Three more years, boys.”

Sky City Casino representatives have confirmed something odd was happening with their roulette wheels during the All Black semi final. “Nine black was the dominant number all night.”

Current All Black first five selections; it seems DC has been replaced by AC. Aaron Cruden gives as electrifying a performance as one would expect from Dan Carter.

Quade Cooper way in over his head. The hole he dug for himself proved to be too much for the young Wallaby first-five. 

When asked why he shouldered Quade Copper, Sonny Bill Williams said “Look my ‘bro was suffering. Watching Quade and his sad little eyes, I felt if I knocked him out cold he might get some sympathy from the crowd.”

When the All Blacks were asked for it. ID produced. ID being Israel Dagg, who gave an outstanding performance.The Aussies had no answers to the questions posed by Dagg, when he had ball in hand 

All Blacks, Wallabies semifinal creates new record for the number of bleeding noses in a test rugby match. Claret was pouring out from many sources.

New Zealand Rugby League has no regrets with playing their TransTasman test on the same day as the World Cup semi. The game drew minimal coverage, so hardly anyone in the country knows the Kiwis got thrashed by the Kangaroos.

Rugby fans annoyed that the refs are playing a dominant part in World Cup games. If the refs did not blow their whistles, it would be hard for them to justify their jobs. If the players did not cheat, the refs would be able to watch the games like the rest of us.

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