Earlier today, the NHL suspended Dallas Stars center Sean Avery for six games due to "off-color" remarks made about his ex-girlfriend. According to NHL commissioner Gary Bettman, Avery's behavior was "detrimental to the league and the game of hockey."
"Playing in the National Hockey League is a privilege, requiring a high standard of personal behavior," Bettman went on to say. "Mr. Avery forfeits that privilege for six games."
Right. Like we are supposed to believe that. You can drop your gloves and start beating the life out of another player and it's only a five-minute penalty, but off-color remarks get you a six-game suspension without pay? Ha!
I suspect that the real reason that Avery is "suspended" was not due to the nature of his comments, but at whom his comments were directed. That's right, Jack Bauer's daughter Kim.
Avery clearly was not thinking straight when he called Kim Bauer "sloppy seconds" because it is never a good idea to mess with to anyone related to Jack Bauer. When a couple of guys from Albania kidnapped his wife and daughter, they all died. It wasn't pretty. A former colleague turned on him and helped with the plot; and we all know what happened to Nina.
Why do you think the reaction from the NHL was so swift? It took months for the NFL to suspend players for positive drug tests but only days for the NHL to suspend someone for talking? Avery and the league knew they had to get him into hiding, and suspending him was the best way to do that.
By suspending Avery, it gives Bauer a week or so to cool down before Avery re-appears, and by then hopefully the whole thing will have blown over. Of course, Jack was held in a Chinese prison for two years without saying a word, so who knows how long he will hold a grudge.
If I were Sean Avery, I'd be looking over my shoulder from now on.