ACC/Big Ten Challenge: Please, Santa, Make It Stop

Dear Santa:

I know it’s been a long time since I’ve written and I’m well aware that this is your busy time of year. But the college basketball world has a dilemma and we weren’t sure who else could help.

You see, this time every year, the ACC/Big Ten Challenge is thrust upon us like a stale fruitcake left over from last Christmas.

Now, what does that have to do with you? Well, let me explain. I’m aware that these are tough times for even the jolliest of folks. Energy costs are through the roof (I can’t imagine the fuel bill to fly your sleigh this year) and plenty of people are out of work (hopefully you didn’t have to lay off any elves). So there will be even more of a burden on you to deliver the goods.

That’s where I come in. Santa, I’m here to lighten your load and make the night a little easier. While most people are asking you to leave them presents, I’m looking for just the opposite.

Santa, please don’t leave the ACC/Big Ten Challenge under my tree for next year.

I mean, really, how much more can college hoops fans take? Throughout 10 years of the Challenge, the Big Ten has yet to win one. That’s right, not one. Goose egg. Nada. Zilch. Does anyone else feel like we’re subjected year after year to watching Lucy pull the football away from gullible Charlie Brown? Good grief, Big Ten!

Before we analyze some stats, let’s give credit where credit is due. While the Big Ten has cornered the market in Challenge futility, all the teams from both leagues deserve recognition for participating. While other schools are running up and down the court and doing rim chin-ups against the cream puffs of the college hoops world, at least these two leagues are playing known commodities.

That being said, the picture isn’t pretty. Children under 13 should cover their eyes or seek parental permission before reading further.

The Big Ten sits at almost 30 games below .500 with a record of 35-62. If this were baseball, 35 out of 97 would capture a batting title. But in hoops it implies one thing: The Big Ten is the nail to the ACC’s hammer.

Duke is 10-0 in Challenge play. Maybe it’s time to exclude the Blue Devils from a fairness standpoint. The Dukies have played seven different opponents, earning two victories over Indiana, Michigan State, and Illinois.

North Carolina, arguably the flagship program of the ACC (although the folks in Durham might have a bone to pick with that), is a pedestrian 5-5 in Challenge play (including an unfathomable 2-3 at home). Count your blessings, Big Ten. The damage could’ve been worse.

Of the 12 ACC teams that have played Challenge games, only three – Georgia Tech, Miami, and Virginia Tech – have losing records. Contrast that with their Midwestern counterparts and only Michigan State, with a mark of 5-4 (their game against Virginia in 2001 was halted by court safety conditions), can claim a winning record.

Three Big Ten teams (Minnesota, Illinois, and Northwestern) have at least seven losses. In defense of the Illini, though, in 1999 and 2000 they played Duke and lost both games by a combined four points.

What’s more, of Illinois’ seven total losses, six of them have been by single digits. And in addition to the two Duke games, the Illini have played UNC three times. They also lost to Maryland the season the Terps cut down the nets so it’s fair to say they’ve been on the short end of some close contests.

The Big Ten has hung tough in half of the Challenges as five of them were decided by a single game. But the ACC has also won twice by scores of 7-2 and 8-3. It should be noted that with the ACC expansion to include Miami, Boston College, and Virginia Tech, the Challenge expanded in 2005 from nine games to 11. So when the Big Ten has been bad, it's been really bad.

Home cooking has been anything but for the Big Ten as conference schools are a mere 27-22 as the host. To make matters worse, they are an abysmal 8-40 on the road.

Look, I’m not trying to do the ultimate hatchet job on the Big Ten. I’m really not. In fact, I love the idea of conferences squaring off on a yearly basis to see which can stick its chest out further. Most fans much prefer to see out-of-conference games against top-flight schools as opposed to contests against much lesser competition where the game is over at halftime and the only drama left for the last two minutes is how many of the walk-ons will score.

But when one conference has been a punching bag for 10 straight years, isn’t it time for a change?

Maybe Jay Bilas summed it up best with regard to the Big Ten when he said “anyone can have a bad decade.”  Glass half full, I suppose.

So, Mr. Claus, I’m sure you can see why the college basketball world has come knocking at your door. Really, we need action and we need it fast. Oh, and Santa, if you’re looking for a last-minute gift idea for the Big Ten, how about some coal?