Notes from a WWE Fangirl: Hell in a Cell Proves to Be Mediocre

Double A .Correspondent IIOctober 3, 2011

As a diehard San Diego Charger's fan I awoke Sunday morning a little bummed.  Yes, it was game day, but alas—apparently not many San Diegans wanted to pay inflated ticket prices to see the Chargers square off against the Miami Dolphins, so as a result the game was blacked out.

Watching the Oakland Raiders lose to the New England Patriots was almost as satisfying, but it was the afternoon's Hell in a Cell on the horizon that put the pep in my step.

Had I known what I was in store for, though, I'd have stayed in bed under my covers. 

I should not have been that surprised.  Night of Champions was only two weeks ago, and there wasn't much to do by way of building up feuds that were going to take place in that amount of time.  I foolishly had remained optimistic. 

If you haven't read the results or looked for video clips online, do not read any further.  If you watched the train wreck as I did, please continue reading.

Some people might argue that HIAC paved the way for potential new feuds.  Mark Henry retained against Randy Orton; perhaps he will face a new opponent at Vengeance, maybe the Big Show will come back, etc.  Big Show would not be a "new" opponent for Henry so that does not get me too excited.

Cena did not win as predicted, so many fans were excited about that, but that match went on entirely too long. I will say this about HIAC—the last 10 minutes were the only ones worth watching, and I feel as fans we were cheated with the 2.5-hour buildup.  Overall, it felt like a glorified episode of Monday Night Raw.

So here it is—the good, the bad, and the ugly.


Sin Cara versus Sin Cara:

This match was a major snoozefest fore me.  Can Sin Cara flip around the ring? Yes.  Is his mood lighting kind of cool? Sure.  Was he big enough to warrant an evil twin and a match at HIAC? Not in my opinion.

Granted the evil Sin Cara finally gives Sin Cara an opponent that can keep up with him in the ring, but he is essentially wrestling himself.

It reminds me of when I played SmackDown: Shut Your Mouth on my PlayStation 2 when I was younger and my boyfriend and I would both pick The Rock or The Undertaker and fight each other.  The Rock versus The Rock was boring then, and Sin Cara versus Sin Cara is boring now.


HHH and Laurinaitis

Did anyone else watching HIAC find HHH's run-in backstage with Laurinaitis awkward? Laurinaitis telling HHH that Miz/Truth were beating up talent in the locker room was a little too Lassie telling someone Timmy fell down a well for me.  Sure, it led the crowd to believe that Miz and Truth were gone for the night after that but that whole thing was poorly placed and definitely not executed.  I was left more thinking "What was the point" than "Oh what could this mean?!"


The Divas Championship

Both a negative and a positive for me.  It is nice to see the championship gain a little credibility and I am happy to see Phoenix as champ but the fact that she needed Natalya to help her win mixed with the slow paced, awkward match of the titan versus the noodle I was subjected to left me a little irked. 

Also, the fact that the announcers went on and on about how the Divas of Destruction were the anti-Barbies really grinds my gears.  If they were the anti-Barbies, then why do both wear more make-up than before and more revealing, shiny clothing?  Since when does Phoenix need an assist to beat Kelly Kelly?  So for me, this match was a win-loose.


Mark Henry vs. Randy Orton

I was glad to see Henry retain.  He is not my favorite superstar by a long shot but I was not thrilled with the idea of the belt dropping to Orton again, so for the time being, Henry works for me.  However, I was a little miffed to see Henry win the match, beat on Orton and then out of nowhere run scared up the ramp.  Sometimes I feel as fans our intelligence is insulted. 


Rhodes vs. Morrison

By way of being a time filler, this match made sense to me but this was far from a "dream matchup."  Rhodes is coming into his own more with his current gimmick and I was happy to see the Original IC belt make a come back.  However, his match with Morrison falls under the same category as the Sin Cara match, why do I care?


Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk vs. John Cena

When this match started with almost an hour left in the PPV, I was curious to see how this was going to play out.  The match itself was so-so for me.  The real action happened in the last 10 minutes or so.  Cena getting locked out of the Cell? Funny.  My Dad and I joked about him going Super Cena on everyone and ripping the door off.  Granted I think most of the IWC would have been happier seeing Cena lose cleanly, it was still refreshing to most of us to have Del Rio win.  Even if I do think his scarf has more star quality than he does. 

The real action started after the match was over.  The Cell was raised, Cena ran in and unleashed the beast on Del Rio and Truth and Miz crash the party.  The Cell is lowered and HHH runs down to try and gain control of the chaos.  Supposedly no one can get the Cell to raise back up and the whole locker room runs down and starts shaking the Cell, including Teddy Long.  Anyone else curious as to what would have happened if Teddy Long had gotten the door open and was the first one in? What exactly was he going to do?

Eventually a random employee with bolt cutters ran down to the ring and saved the day, allowing Miz and Truth to be arrested and HHH to serve them with a beat down on their way back up the ramp.  Would the anarchy continue? What does RAW have in store for us? After 2.5 hours of the same old song and dance and a numb butt, finally, some excitement. 


This was not the worst PPV by far, but it was definitely not the best.  As a fan, if I am shelling out the money for a PPV two weeks after I just bought the last one, the least WWE can do is make it entertaining, put some thought into it.

This PPV felt like a last-minute project slapped together five minutes before it was due, and I do not have much more confidence in Vengeance, as it is fast approaching.  Was the 2.5-hour buildup worth it? Only Raw can tell us.