Ohio State 42, Michigan 7
Final Record: 3-9, 2-6 10th place in Big Ten
Before I get started let me just add this little disclaimer. I was thoroughly hammered during most of the game and don't remember much of the second half.
I started pounding beers after Beanie Wells 59-yard touchdown run that looked eerily similar from the past two seasons.
Guess not much has changed after all. Three straight years Wells has now made Michigan's defense look foolish with long runs right up middle.
And it wasn't just that play. It was multiple big plays by Ohio State that took me from light afternoon drinking straight to binge drinking.
For the first time in history, Ohio State has won five straight against the Wolverines and for only the second time in history has Michigan lost to all three of its rivals in one season.
Bo Schembechler is rolling over in his grave.
But the worst season in Michigan history is finally over and I don't have to grade performances anymore so let's get this over with.
At least we can all take solace knowing that Nick Sheridan will never again take a snap as the starting quarterback of the Michigan Wolverines.
The only throw he's capable of making is the wide receiver bubble screen pass. Other than that he can't throw the ball past the line of scrimmage unless the wideout is fully expecting to catch the ball at his feet.
His 8-for-24 and 87 yards performance wouldn't be good enough on a middle school football team. How this guy has ever been considered a quarterback past the pee-wee level is beyond my understanding.
Michigan put together one decent drive all day that relied on two fourth down conversions including Brandon Minor's touchdown run.
Minor finished the day with 77 yards on 14 carries to lead the rushing game but most of that came on one carry for 32 yards.
After Carlos Brown had a good day against Northwestern, he only carried the ball three times on Saturday in Columbus.
Michael Shaw got some carries and showed some flash but then he was no where to be found again.
The entire offense was abysmal. Martavious Odoms continued dropping the balls thrown right to him including the only good pass Sheridan can throw, a bubble screen.
The Wolverines started the game with six consecutive three and outs and finished the game with 10 total.
I really don't know what happened to Michigan's offense the last two weeks. It had made such progress the previous weeks against Purdue, Minnesota and each week it seemed to be improving.
But the last two games have been a total nightmare.
Offensive Grade: F
For the second straight week Stevie Brown intercepted a pass on the opening drive only to see the offense squander the opportunity to put early points on the board.
Then, right on cue, he goes back to being the same old Stevie Brown we know and hate.
Terrelle Pryor continually challenged Brown throughout the game after being intercepted by him early on. It's like Pryor took offense to being picked off by one of the worst safeties in the conference and made it a mission to make him look stupid.
It was really disappointing to see the defense collapse like it did. They held Ohio State to one first down on its first four drives then the big plays started happening.
The defense must of thought to itself 'hey, the offense isn't going to help us so screw it.'
Obi Ezeh once again has not proved that he'll be a leader on this team next year and Donovan Warren was so upset he refused to talk to the media after the game.
Can't blame him either. I wouldn't want to talk about the most embarrassing loss to Ohio State in 40 years either knowing I was responsible for it.
I'm not saying Warren is necessarily responsible for it but the defense just seemed to give up especially after giving up another big touchdown run early in the third quarter.
Dan Herron's 49-yard run took all the air out of the defense and deflated the Wolverines.
Defensive Grade: F
K.C. Lopata has officially joined the ranks of Phillip Brabbs and will forever be among my most hated Wolverines of all time.
Remember the days when Michigan had kickers like Jay Feely, Hayden Epstein and field goals were just automatic? Yeah, me neither.
And it really boggles my mind why Rich Rodriguez continually puts Martavious Odoms on punt returns. Michigan fans should take out a restraining order against him barring any involvement with special teams.
Zoltan was reliable as always.
Special Teams Grade: D-
Rich Rodriguez had no trick plays up his sleeve and basically did nothing but shove his players out onto the field and said lets get this over with.
A shouting match took place between him and John Thompson early in the game after a timeout was called.
It was sad and looked very dysfunctional.
It was clear to me that things have been just too complicated for these kids all season long and they just weren't getting whatever he was preaching.
If he had just simplified things early on and progressively added things as the season went on, Michigan might of won a couple more games.
There was also no continuity. Especially in the backfield. Every other play there was a different running back. Where was Carlos Brown throughout the game, why didn't Brandon Minor get more carries and now Sam McGuffie seems all but lost after being alienated by the coaching staff.
Coaches grade: F
I'm so sick of losing to Ohio State and now Buckeye fans are starting to say that this isn't a real rivalry anymore.
One, they're full of crap. They love it that they've won five straight now.
Two, this just fuels the rivalry fire. More and more frustration is being built up in Ann Arbor and sooner or later it's going to explode. Hopefully right in Jim Tressel's face.
Three, someone find me a high powered drill so I can take it to my temple.
Final Grade: F