25 Sports Gigs with No Job Security

Austin SchindelAnalyst IISeptember 16, 2011

25 Sports Gigs with No Job Security

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    Athletes have the best jobs in the world. They get to play a game for a living and get paid millions to do so. But, like all Americans, the job market is bad and one mistake here or there and you'll lose it.

    Here are the jobs that you do not want to have in sports. They'll make you millions one day, and have you holding up a sign asking for change the next.

    These are the 25 sports gigs with no job security.

25. Boston Red Sox Shortstop

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    Since Nomar Garciaparra was traded, the Red Sox have trotted out six different opening day shortstops. The revolving door at the position has not stopped the team from being a perennial contender, but it still is a sore spot for the franchise.

    At this point, they would probably welcome Nomar back from the broadcasting booth.

24. Rockies Pitcher

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    Pitching in Colorado is like giving someone one of those huge wiffle ball bats—the batter always has the advantage. 

    The Rockies have always tried to acquire pitchers who could deal with the video game-like atmosphere, including Mike Hampton. Of course that didn't work, and the search continues.

    Even this season, the team traded pitching star Ubaldo Jimenez to the Indians despite him being one of the best young pitchers in baseball. 

23. Philadelphia Flyers Goalie

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    The 2011 Philadelphia Flyers had the offense to get out of the Eastern Conference but had three goaltenders that couldn't stop a nose bleed.

    The dynamic trio of Brian Boucher, Michael Leighton and Sergei Bobrovsky were so horrible in the playoffs that it was like a game of musical chairs. 

    Coach Peter Laviolette could not find the right player at the right time, leading to an eventual playoff exit. Now, it looks like they all lost their jobs.

22. Texans Running Back

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    The Houston Texans backfield has been a revolving door of no-names and washed-up veterans since their inaugural season.

    Ron Dayne, Steve Slaton and Ahman Green were all fixtures in Houston before Arian Foster came in and took the job away.

    I don't know who to blame more; the pass-happy offense or running backs who are just not that good.

    By the way, get healthy soon, Arian. Ben Tate looks pretty good.

21. Milton Bradley's Anger Management Coach

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    I think this coach has already made it pretty clear that he or she has given up. 

    But, if that brave soul is still working on Bradley, they are seconds away from getting yelled at and fired.

    There is no job security for someone who has a client who needed to be restrained by his manager and breaks bats.

20. Notre Dame Head Coach

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    If you want to count the one game that Kent Baer coached and the zero that George O'Leary did, then there have been a total of six different coaches for the Fighting Irish since 1997.

    As the college landscape has changed, and Notre Dame has lost its luster, getting the best players in the country has become more difficult.

    There is an insane amount of pressure to win in South Bend despite growing competition from schools all over the country.

    It is a tall order for any coach to stand up to.

19. Any Member of the Dallas Mavericks

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    Remember the days when Mark Cuban used to be even crazier?

    I'm talking about the years when he would trade half his team for another big name on the market, yet didn't re-sign Steve Nash.

    Well, to this day, the Mavericks are always in the middle of trade rumors, whether it is for Carmelo Anthony, or Shaq O'Neal back in the day.

    Cuban finally got the right team together by acquiring Jason Kidd, and NOT making any more dumb trades.

18. Chelsea F.C. Manager

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    Chelsea, for all of its talent and success, has had eight different managers since 2000.

    Granted, soccer is very different than American sports in both the way the teams are run and the purpose of the manager, but eight managers still seems a bit much.

    I wonder if each time they send someone to fire the coach, they bring in a Donald Trump look-alike to sit across the desk and say, "You're fired!"

17. Redskins Quarterback

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    It looks like Donovan McNabb, at that point, had given up and was just listening to some music.

    During every Redskins game, there is some sort of promo that shows all of the different quarterbacks the team has used since 2000. This is a motley crew of guys brought in to be saviors, and others who did some rather stupid things

    All in all, the position has not been the model of stability. The best example of this is giving McNabb a huge extension after a bad game, and then trading him the following offseason.

16. Nyjer Morgan's Agent

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    Is there a bigger and more ridiculous personality in baseball right now?

    He is spontaneous, goofy and the type of guy who would fire his agent, publicist and own mother if he felt the time was right.

    His agent is probably considering him a day-to-day kind of client—he is certainly not getting too attached.

15. Buffalo Bills Head Coach

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    You have got to feel bad for a Bills coach.

    They play in the cold what seems like all year round, and they have to play in the same division with the Patriots, and now the up and coming Jets. 

    To top it all off, WHO WANTS TO PLAY IN BUFFALO?!?! Do you know how hard it is to sell the amenities of upstate New York?

    The product has been subpar ever since the days of Marv Levy, and they don't look like they'll change anytime soon.

14. Oakland Raiders Head Coach

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    Since Jon Gruden left in 2001, there has been no coach with an above-.500 record for the Raiders. 

    This can be directed towards the fact that Al Davis is impossible to please (by the way, if anyone has seen him in a while, let me know, because he seems to be MIA) and they keep drafting players who are just, well, fast.

    There will never be job security in Oakland as long as the ghost of Al Davis rules the roost. 

13. Detroit Lions Quarterback

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    12 quarterbacks in 10 years is no recipe for success.

    Injuries were a part of this large number, but an overwhelming number was due to a common disease caused by the water in Detroit: football suckitis.

    When Joey Harrington is your most stable quarterback in a decade, you have problems. 

    There was no job security, because nobody could take the job and make it theirs.

12. NFL Kicker

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    Veteran kicker David Akers said it best when he told reporters that there is absolutely no job security for an NFL kicker. 

    Akers cites the new kickoff rules as being one of the reasons, but I think that same statement holds true for any kicker that misses a couple of field goals in a game.

    There is no coincidence that the same kickers find their way from team to team. It is not because their services are in high demand; it is because someone else keeps messing up in front of them.

    Teams know how important the kicking game is, and one big miss can spell the end of the road for a pro kicker. 

11. Chicago Cubs Closer

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    Here are a list of the Cubs closers with at least five saves for the team since 1999:

    Ryan Dempster 
    Joe Borowski 
    Rick Aguilera 
    Kerry Wood 
    LaTroy Hawkins 
    Tom Gordon 
    Antonio Alfonseca 
    Kevin Gregg 
    Bob Howry 
    Terry Adams 
    Jeff Fassero 
    Carlos Marmol 
    Rod Beck

    Enough said.

10. CC Sabathia's Dietitian

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    Sabathia claims he lost 25 pounds this offseason by cutting out Cap'n Crunch from his morning diet.

    That is all well and good, but like a drug, if you let the man near the delicious breakfast cereal, he could fall off the wagon and balloon again.

    One day you are feeding him fresh fruit and salad, and the next he is shoveling tasty cakes into his mouth.

9. Minnesota Timberwolves Point Guard

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    When the Timberwolves drafted Jonny Flynn and Ricky Rubio back-to-back in the 2009 NBA Draft, everyone was confused as to how the two could play together. 

    Drafting two point guards was curious, and then the T-Wolves kept loading up. They drafted Ty Lawson with the 20th pick (though eventually traded), and over the last two seasons signed Ramon Sessions and Luke Ridnour.

    This point-guard bonanza makes about as much sense as hiring a sportswriter to be a general manager... oh wait.

8. New Jersey Devils Head Coach

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    Since 2000, there have been 12 different coaching changes in New Jersey.

    Whenever things don't seem to be going well, general manager Lou Lamoriello takes over the bench until he can find a replacement. This has happened not once, but twice during his tenure.

    The interesting part about the whole situation is that the team has been good during that time period. But regardless, change is the only constant for the Devils.

7. Miami Heat Head Coach

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    I do not think that Stan Van Gundy sent Pat Riley a Christmas card after usurping him as head coach in the middle of a championship season.

    Everyone was calling for Erik Spoelstra's head early last season while Riley looked on from the sidelines, claiming his coaching days were over.

    It must be scary standing on the sidelines every game knowing that the godfather is sitting in the stands stroking his gelled back hair and laughing (evilly).

6. Brian Wilson's Barber

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    Is there someone with a more important task than preserving "the beard." They have to make sure it is trimmed to the perfect length and remains clean and bug-free.

    I can imagine Wilson losing it if the barber gets too close or doesn't do a good job. All the power is in the beard. ALL OF IT!

5. University of Miami Head Football Coach

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    There hasn't been a coach that last at The U for more than six seasons since 1970. The football team was a powerhouse, yet still couldn't keep one coach at the helm.

    This trend continued after the national championship days of the 90s and into the 2000s.

    Now, after more controversy, Al Golden takes over the team, hoping to clean up their act and produce a winning product.

4. Real Madrid Manager

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    10 managers in 10 years for one of the best teams in the world is fascinating. But, then again, with one of the highest payrolls in the world, if they do not win La Liga each year, it was a failure.

    They think they have found their man in Jose Mourinho, one of the most high-profile coaches in the world.

    Regardless, there is no job security for a club that has every tool to win every tournament they enter.

3. NFL Punt/Kickoff Returner

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    This position is usually relegated for young, fast reserves who have great cutting abilities and open-field vision.

    But, what the NFL gods giveth, the NFL gods hath taken away. One fumbled punt or a kickoff taken from eight yards deep to no avail are easy ways to find yourself cut or, at the very least, getting reamed out by a pissed-off coach.

    A few years ago, we had Dante Hall and Chad Morton. Now it is Devin Hester and Joshua Cribbs. These guys are a dime a dozen.

2. New York Yankees Manager

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    I don't care what anyone says. The Yankees managerial job comes with a degree of pressure that few other jobs in sports have.

    You won the World Series? Good, that is what you are supposed to do. Lose the World Series, your head is on the chopping block.

    Joe Torre's tenure in New York was lengthy, but it did not come without threats from the front office, and contract disputes that made every fan scratch their head. 

    I'll conclude with one name that will sum up my argument: Billy Martin.

1. Patriots Wide Receiver

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    When Tom Brady is your quarterback, there is no wide receiver who is more important than the team. If you don't believe me, ask Randy Moss or Deion Branch.

    Moss, who had one of the best seasons for a receiver in NFL history, was traded mid-season for, you guessed it, a draft pick.

    Branch was a Super Bowl MVP who had to beg his way back to the team after leaving for more money and bombing elsewhere.

    It is the Patriot way to buy low and sell high. This could include most positions on team, but for now, we'll just worry about the wideouts.