Nebraska Football: The Past Holds the Key to Cornhuskers' Offensive Success

(Please, Taylor, don't hurt 'em! Photo originally located here.)

Welcome to the Husker Hotwire, the sometimes-weekly, sometimes-funny look at Husker athletics!

The 1980s were a great decade. Hotwire staff members could wear their parachute pants on the subway without getting funny looks. There was music on MTV. A Transformers movie hit the screen without either Michael Bay or Shia LaBeouf being involved. New episodes of Punky Brewster were being released.

Okay, maybe it wasn't all great.

But it was mostly great. And that's why the Husker Hotwire staff was so excited to see the super-snazzy new Nebraska offense unveiled. Because the super-snazzy, super-secret offense ended up looking a lot like the super-boring, super-predictable, super-effective offense of Nebraska in the 1980s.

Triple options! Speed options to the short side of the field! Heck, new offensive coordinator Tim Beck's idea of a bone to the fans was to have his first play call be a fullback dive! After seven years in the Bill Callahan/Shawn Watson wilderness, who even knew that the fullback was a legal ball carrier anymore?

But the Hotwire staff needed a little more evidence before declaring a return to the grand old 80s at Memorial Stadium. Admittedly, the recent behavior of the Miami Hurricanes seemed right in line with "The U" from Luther Campbell's days, so maybe there was something to the 80s vibe.

It wasn't until the Hotwire got a look at the statistics from Nebraska's game against Chattanooga that they felt secure in their 80s flashback. Taylor Martinez, 11-of-22 for 116 yards.

Wow. A quarterback who is a wizard at running the ball and a little sketchy throwing it. My God, it could be the second coming of Steve Taylor.

So, if this second act goes according to plan, Bo Pelini will build his team up to be a conference champion contender, go to big bowl games, get clobbered on a regular basis (this is seeming less pleasant), upset the fans, flirt with a job offer from Colorado (this is also getting less plausible) and finally win a national championship 20 years or so after taking the job.

Hmm. Maybe this whole "back to the 80s" thing isn't quite as exciting as it first seemed. Still, the parachute pants are cool.

B1G CONFERENCE UPDATE

 At the Husker Hotwire, we are committed to bring you continuing coverage of Nebraska's new conference foes in the B1G Conference. Wolverine Hotwire reports that Michigan is considering playing more night games in Ann Arbor if this year's first-ever after-dark contest against Notre Dame is successful.

Of course, such a monumental use of technology would take careful study and consideration from the Michigan powers that be. However, should the night games prove feasible, rumor has it that Michigan will be commissioning a study to consider replacing the rotary phones in the Michigan athletic offices prior to the 2017 season. 

AROUND THE HOTWIRE NETWORK

 Jayhawk Hotwire reports that the Kansas Board of Regents would "prefer" that Kansas and Kansas State stay together if the Big 12 Conference dissolves. They would also "prefer" that the Jayhawks and the Wildcats remain in a BCS conference—which sounds very much like a homeless man saying he would "prefer" to sleep in a five-star hotel room instead of the refrigerator box he's called home for the last month. Completely honest, but extremely unlikely to happen.

And, staying on the conference realignment front, Sooner Hotwire reports that head Sooner Bob Stoops said it "wasn't necessary" for Oklahoma and Texas to continue their long-running Red River Shootout Rivalry game. This makes a lot of sense. After all, a rivalry between Oklahoma and Washington State should be just as meaningful to the Sooners as the Oklahoma-Texas matchup. As long as the check from the Pac-16 clears, of course.

Terrapin Hotwire reports that, allegedly, Maryland played and won a football game over the weekend. Those reports cannot be confirmed, however, due to the entire Internet being deluged by comments over Maryland's state-flag-based uniforms. Terrapin Hotwire staff didn't really understand what all the hullabaloo was about, but that's not surprising given the Hotwire staff's affinity for a certain Batman villain.

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