Packers News: Brett Favre Blames Playoff Loss on Love for Center Wells
It was a frustrating Sunday evening for Cheesehead nation.
Last week, not only did the Green Bay Packers lose a surprising overtime contest to the New York Giants that sent Big Blue to Arizona for next week's Super Bowl—but an even more stunning piece of news crept across the land:
Brett Favre's admission for his love for center Scott Wells.
Not only did Favre come out of the closet, as it were, but he blamed his poor play not on the frigid, subzero conditions, but on his strong sexual attractions for the beefy 6’3” center out of Tennessee.
"Look," a nervous Favre said in a press conference. "I've been thinking about this for a while, letting everyone know for my love for this man—our love, really."
It all began innocently enough several years ago when the young center began snapping the ball to the legendary quarterback.
"I was scared at first," Wells admitted. "He had such a reputation around camp. But he was so gentle when he placed his hands right under me...I got chills."
Favre and his wife Deanna had separated months ago, but for obvious reasons, she kept showing up for Packers games anyway to protect the quarterback's reputation.
"I wish Brett only the best; I had suspected this for a long time," a weepy Deanna said. "He's a wonderful father."
The Favres have agreed to an amicable divorce. They will share custody of their two daughters Brittany and Breleigh.
Favre's mother Bonita was also not surprised to learn the news.
"Brett was a special child," Mrs. Favre relates. "True, he was a great athlete on the playing field, and excelled at everything masculine, but that was only one side of him."
There was another side of Brett that no one knew, and everyone will know, now.
For instance, Favre loved ballet, Broadway musicals, and was a huge fan of Liza Minelli. Given his conservative Southern roots, it was difficult to be the "real" Brett Favre.
"Now I can be myself, finally," Brett said recently at the home he and Wells share, their jerseys draped next to each other, side-by-side, on the satin couch they recently purchased.
Wells held Favre's hand as they two looked off into the sunset.
Both have denied rumors that they have mutually requested a trade to the San Francisco 49ers.
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