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New England Patriots: Still Alive—Commentary

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New England Patriots: Still Alive—Commentary

First and foremost, don't ask about the picture; I just thought it looked odd and might raise some eyebrows.

Also, before I can say anything else, I have to remark: the Phillies won the World Series? Really? Like, seriously? Man...Disney must be pissed.

So, anyway, now that we got all that out of the way, on to more important things. The purpose of this column is to offer my personal commentary on, well, other peoples comments.

For most of my time writing for Bleacher Report, I would publish a column pertaining to a unique topic on each Monday and Thursday. Unfortunately, I found that coming up with a new subject twice a week took way too much mental effort.

So, for a few weeks anyway, I want to try a little experiment. I will write a regular Monday column, as usual, only then I will take the most entertaining comment from it and lambast, ridicule and just generally try to think of clever things to say about it in my Thursday column.

I have no idea how well this is going to go. It could turn out to be terrible (especially if I can't think of anything witty to say). At the very least, though, it will give me a chance to be silly once every seven days, and I'm definitely a fan of the silliness.

So, here we go...

On Monday, my column entitled New England Patriots: Still Alive">New England Patriots: Still Alive was commented on 17 times. The most entertaining of the bunch was by George:

"You are stepping out and saying they are in the play offs ? That real BIG of you. You say your a numbers man all well and fine. I myself am a realist as well as a major Patriot Fan I have followed them since 1960.
Had Season Tickets since 1964, Froze my Butt at many outdoor winter games watched the Snow Plow come out against Miami to clear a spot to kick the winning field goal. Froze it again in the play offs and the infamous "TUCK RULE" game. just to mention a few.
So take it from some one who eats,sleeps and walk with the Pats. 2008 finishes as follows AFC East Champs -N.E.Pats., AFC Champs- NE Patriots and 2008 Super bowl Champs- NE Patriots . With MVP going to Kevin Faulk. Wes Welker or Matt Cassel. Thats the way it goes."

I think it might be best to break this down into pieces. It's much easier for me that way. We'll start with the first two sentences:

"You are stepping out and saying they are in the play offs ? That real BIG of you."

So, that's how it's gonna be, huh?

I can usually take a little ribbing, but are you calling me fat? There is nothing in this world that brings on my ire more than a comment about the size of my butt, and that includes the holocaust.

"You say your a numbers man all well and fine."

I don't remember saying that. I'm more of a letters man, really. Numbers are kind of boring. The only thing you can do with numbers is put them together to make more numbers. Letters can make words and sentences and stuff. Much more exciting.

"I myself am a realist as well as a major Patriot Fan I have followed them since 1960.
Had Season Tickets since 1964, Froze my Butt at many outdoor winter games watched the Snow Plow come out against Miami to clear a spot to kick the winning field goal. Froze it again in the play offs and the infamous "TUCK RULE" game. just to mention a few."

The most important thing to take away from this sentence, though, is that you're old! My father was nine in 1964! My mother was five! You had season tickets when my parents were playing in the sand! That's just inconceivable. How do you even know how to use a computer?

That being said, I must say that I, too, have watched most of the important games from the 1960's and beyond. The only difference is, I did it from the comfort of my living room in full 1080i HD. I may be "stepping out" here, but I think I saw the "tuck" play in a little better clarity than you did shivering from the stands.

"So take it from some one who eats,sleeps and walk with the Pats."

Okay, now I take back every comment I wrote above that could be construed as possible "not nice." I want to be your best friend from now on! I would love to eat and walk with the Patriots! I've heard the buffet spread in the locker room is to die for.

I'm not so sure about the sleeping, though. I think my wife might object to that. I'll just leave that one to you if you don't mind.

"2008 finishes as follows AFC East Champs -N.E.Pats., AFC Champs- NE Patriots and 2008 Super bowl Champs- NE Patriots . With MVP going to Kevin Faulk. Wes Welker or Matt Cassel. Thats the way it goes."

See, here is where I get confused. For a while it seemed like you were mad at me. You even called me fat, for crying out loud! And then you go ahead and agree with me; very baffling.

You see, I also think the Pats are headed for good times come January. They have effectively proven that they can compete even with some of their best talent is riding the plastic (benches aren't made of wood anymore, it's time for that cliche to die). I'm not 100% convinced the Lombardi is in the cards, but a decent playoff run is almost assured.

So, please, George, let's put all this nonsense aside and get on the same page. I may have had some silly fun at your expense, but that's just what happens when you make fun of my weight. And when it comes right down to it, we're both the same, you and me; we both love the Pats, we both want to see them do well, and we both think we'll get our wish.

So, instead of squabbling, it's time to show our mutual love for the Pats, and grab the chili and nachos so we can cheer them on to victory against the Colts come Sunday night! Let's not forget that the Pats started out 3-4 in 2001 and went on the win the Super Bowl. They're in a better position now. Don't count this team out!

(If you wish to have a comment ridiculed in my next Thursday column, all you have to do is create an entertaining comment on my forthcoming Monday column and maybe I'll pick it. Good luck!)

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