Ohio State's Monster.com Posting: "Will Pay Top Euro for Offensive Coordinator!"

Scribe Written on October 27, 2008

I'm sick...physically ill. If I have to watch the 2008 edition of the Ohio State offense again, I might just vomit all over the computer screen and then hit send, and that will be my article for next week.

WHEW! That felt good to get off my chest. Almost like a good ol' verbal teaspoon of Pepto-Bismol for the tummy. As a matter of fact, it felt so good, I think I'm gonna drink myself a whole verbal bottle full...

Explain to me, the "common man," who doesn't know the true intellect of football, how you can go count 'em...one...two...three college football games during a singular season without scoring an offensive touchdown?!?!

Better yet, explain to me, the "ignorant fan," the following numbers out of 120 Division I college football teams...

- 95th in the NCAA in passing offense

- 24th in the NCAA in rushing offense (mind you, this is what Ohio State does AT LEAST 75 percent of the time)

- 67th in the NCAA in scoring offense

- 95th in the NCAA in total offense

- 41st in the NCAA in third down efficiency

- 99th in the country in sacks allowed

Now for the greatest riddle of all: If an offense can't throw the football, can't convert third downs, and can't protect the quarterback...how does it score???

Ah...but it's a trick question, because if you are THE Ohio State University, you don't know what the end zone is unless you are the defense and special teams! Because it's become perfectly clear that this offense can't find it.

Jim Bollman should be fired IMMEDIATELY...IMMEDIATELY. And they should scour the country to find an assistant coach to try to teach this offensive line how to friggin' block!

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written on October 27, 2008 Opinion

Bleacher Report has a featured columnist opening for Ohio State Football.

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