After the Cowboys lost to the St. Louis Rams, yes the St. Louis Rams, last Sunday, yes last Sunday, not eight years ago, the question was whether Tony Romo would be able to play with his broken pinkie, yes, his broken pinkie, in next week’s game.
Romo addressed these questions in between taking his pacifier in and out of his mouth and while his diaper was being changed. When asked the straight question of whether or not he’d start the next Cowboys game, Romo simply cried, “I want my mommy.”
Wade Phillips rushed to his quarterback’s side and began cradling him in his arms and kissing his boo-boo. Sensing Romo was hungry, Phillips opened his shirt and began breast feeding him as he tried to answer the media’s questions. “He didn’t have his ‘Flintstones’ vitamins yet,” he said. “And soon he’ll have to be put down for a nap.”
An apparently not tired Romo cried out, “I’m not tired!” To which Phillips stuck his pacifier back into his mouth, and attempted to burp him.
Questioned about the injury, Phillips confirmed that he had indeed complained to the league office about the hit Romo took that resulted in the ouchy, but he hit a setback when he couldn’t figure out which play the injury happened on, and could not confirm that his pinky was even touched.
The media then asked Phillips if Romo had in fact called Brett Favre, or vice versa, Romo shouted out, “Favre is a doo-doo head!” Phillips said that the phone call did happen, but the conversation was more along the lines of Favre discussing the advantages of his adult diapers versus Romo’s baby diapers. So far, the two quarterbacks have been unable to agree on which has better durability.
Asked where his team would go from then, Phillips said first he’d go get his big boy there some ice cream and then read him a bedtime story. But not “The Wizard of Oz,” because that one gives the little tyke nightmares.
Brad Johnson, one of the few players on the Cowboys roster who DOES have a Super Bowl ring, will continue to start for Dallas until Romo starts to feel better. The interview then came to a close as Romo began to projective vomit. Phillips then was heard to say, “At least it’s not his pinkie we have to worry about now.”